Daniel Thwaites | Except for money, it flows downhill

I believe in the trickle-down theory, just not in economics where it happens to be popular. In other spheres of life, though, like in the degradation and defilement of aesthetics, tastes, and morals, it seems to me quite obvious that the trickle-down theory explains a helluva lot.

That’s because I think a very compelling case can be made that the corruption of thought at the higher levels of society licenses and encourages it further down the food chain.

Plus, it doesn’t take much to encourage people to feed their demons and “big up dem b***dk***t self”.

The basic insight is that although money might not flow downhill, s**t of every other sort does.

Let’s have a look at the economy first.

The stellar successes of the stock market are not to be overlooked or taken for granted, but they’re hardly cause for too much celebration when the economic growth remains pitiful and there’s precious little trickling going down. ‘5 in 4’ has turned into ‘1 in 5’ or ‘0.3 in 1’.

I remember the gangsta hand-signals for ‘5 in 4’ when it was launched. Everyone looked very hip and trendy. So I’m hoping Michael Lee-Chin was flashing it when he delivered up the excuses this last week, the most ironic of which was “lack of accountability”. Cuz that’s gangsta.

Now, obviously, I’m not prepared to criticise Lee-Chin too much on the off chance that he might drop a check for a mil or two off at my gate by mistake, but surely he can’t miss that the Economic Growth Council (EGC) has failed on its self-proclaimed mandate. And it’s stunningly unaccountable.

I’m not quite saying that he should put on his best tear-up draws, stand in the mirror, point, and say “You’re FIRED”, but that’s only because I still believe he has a lot to offer Jamaica. However, by his own calculus, he would qualify as a politically charged permanent secretary of the EGC, and needs the boot.

Let’s see if the “lack of accountability” trickles down, although that would tend to happen very quickly. On the other hand, if there’s a trickle in the economy, it’s painfully slow.

Next up: the progressive coarsening of the country.

A CHEAP FORWARD

Waldane Walker, the valedictorian at the Edna Manley College of the Visual and Performing Arts is, I’m certain, a bright young guy with a smashing future. And graduation is a time for high spirits and good feelings. But somebody is doing him a disservice if they’ve taught him that dropping a massive k***t in his speech would do much more than get him a cheap “forward”.

Let me hasten to say that I have great hope for Mr Walker, because he trembled while going that route. You see, I’ve watched the video and it’s clear that he was building up to the violation of the taboo and the delivery of the BIG BC. His voice was quivering. No doubt, it will be said, due to emotional tremulousness. But I think it’s pretty obvious that it was the upcoming b***dk***t weighing him down.

So the first thing we have to wrestle with is the fact that we have some marvellous Jamaican cuss words. They are so round and buxom, so magnificently explosive and charged, so evolutionarily prepared for conjoining into complex tapestries of klaatery, that it’s tempting to draw on them frequently. But that temptation must be resisted.

One curious argument is that this cursing is expressive ‘Jameikan’, which would somehow make it appropriate. Who would ever advocate such nonsense?

Well, just this past August, the police were heavily criticised for directing Mighty Crown, a group from Japan, to stop performing while at the Fully Loaded stage show in St Ann. Now, when adult patrons buy tickets to see a performance, I generally say let the whole horse and pony show go ahead. But it was the hyperventilating that the police action excited that caught my attention.

Dr André Haughton felt that events should be rated, so people could know what they’re buying. OK. I doubt that’s a pressing issue in St James, though.

Meanwhile, Dr Carolyn Cooper delivered this:

“Jamaican bad words that refer to female genitalia and the bloody specifics of menstruation are signs of the potency of female sexuality. I think it’s this woman power that is summoned in the act of voicing the so-called bad word. It’s an acknowledgment of the role of women as mothers”.

So when de feisty young bwoy tell granny to “move yuh b***o k***l!” it’s not that he’s an untrained lout. No! He’s summoning woman power and acknowledging the role of women as mothers. You really can’t make this stuff up!

But if the intellectual class is this vacuous, can you really blame Waldane Walker too much? Remember, s**t flows downhill.

Most developed languages, as far as I know, have swear words. That’s because people have sacred things, and, therefore, there are taboos and things which ought not to be casually uttered. But the idea that because it’s local means it’s acceptable strikes me as a close cousin to the excuse that the pederast is mi uncle and, therefore, not really so bad.

STUPIDNESS ISN’T EXCLUSIVE

English has its curses, and if Mr Walker had dropped one or two of those into the speech, there would be much pearl-clutching and clucking about impropriety. Nobody would’ve thought it OK. So why should there be a complete relaxation of standards just because it’s a home-grown expletive? Stupidness isn’t exclusive to any one language or idiom.

I’ve heard another excuse about “creatives” and artistic types being oblivious to society’s conventions, which is, of course, nonsense. They are the most aware of them.

At any rate, apparently there was a time (it must have been very long ago) when education was aimed at gaining some knowledge and familiarity with those things which are ‘Beautiful, True, and Good’. That was especially so for higher education, when one had passed from merely learning the readin’ ritin’ and ‘rithmetic and were concentrating on more elevated things. Now the higher up they go, the more injudicious they seem to become.

Imagine mi granny, Sister Vi, get up and put on har best frock and har best wig. Uncle Maurice pull out the Clarks and his best pants-length. Little brother and little sister get bade-off, rub-dung, and shine-up. Where are they heading? To watch de big pickney graduate from uppa college.

So they suffer through the heat, take their seats, endure interminable speaky-spoky. And then to close it off, granny and uncle are served up the indignity of hearing that what big sister Suzie is supposed to do now that they’ve sacrificed to put her through college is “big up har b***dk***t self”.

No bredrin. Small up yuh b***dk***t self. Try that for a change.

You see, that’s the problem when you start cutting k***t everywhere and without regard for your surroundings. There’s really no shortage of k***t, so we artificially manufacture a scarcity.

It’s a process generally known as civility.

- Daniel Thwaites is an attorney-at-law. Email feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com.