Devon Dick | Write your own eulogy

Last month, at the funeral service for Elvena L’Amour Williams Riettie, the eulogy that was read was written by her. There are persons who plan their funeral programmes by selecting the hymns, the scripture readings, the musical selections, and the main participants. Elvena did that, and more. She also printed the funeral programme with pictures. The only thing missing was the date of her death. In that funeral programme was her eulogy. This was the first time I witnessed someone writing his or her own eulogy.

A eulogy is a good word about the dearly departed person and usually includes the life story, starting from birth – who were the parents, which schools were attended and the major achievements, as well as who the person was.

What are the benefits of writing your own eulogy? This is not as morbid as it sounds, nor is it necessarily self-absorbed. Writing one’s eulogy is really one’s autobiography. Famous people write autobiographies, but ordinary citizens do not write autobiographies. So writing your own eulogy is an opportunity for all to write your own story; your life history. It is a last chance to let people know who you were and what you have accomplished. And who better to know us, than ourselves. Yes, the danger is that everybody has a blind spot and does not fully know himself or herself. However, tributes by others can make up for that deficit. Writing your own eulogy might contain some embellishments, but that can happen also when others write it. Writing your own eulogy allows one to decide what will remain personal matters which the deceased does not want to share with the general public. Writing one’s own eulogy will ensure that the good that is done is not interred with one’s bones, but a last chance is available to make it known in order to inspire and motivate others to live a noble life.

LIVED A GOOD LIFE

Paul, in the Bible, appears to have written his eulogy on the moment of his imminent death, when he declared, ‘ I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith’ (2 Tim 4: 7). Paul is saying that he has lived a full life in which he overcame the forces of evil; he proclaimed the good news of salvation in Jesus the Christ; and he has completed the ministry assigned to him. So, nothing is intrinsically wrong in writing our own eulogy.

Too often when others write another person’s eulogy, they see it as a time to highlight the faults of the deceased. The eulogy is not the time for bad habits and sins to be mentioned. The eulogy is the final authoritative statement on the life and times of the deceased.

There is nothing wrong with writing your own eulogy. In fact, there is much to commend it. And in a sense, we are all writing our eulogy by the way we live. Even if we are unable to physically write it, we are writing our eulogy by our lifestyle. Exemplifying this are two members of Boulevard Baptist Church who are in their 90th year – Sisters Pearl Steele and Emma McCalla. Both are writing their eulogy by their Christian witness. Steele gave yeoman service for decades as a chorister, and Emma McCalla, of Cellular King fame, still visits members who are sick and shut-in, and recognises some members on their birthdays by her telephone calls.

Therefore, live a life that writes a wonderful eulogy or consider putting pen to paper and start writing your own.

PS: Happy belated International Women’s Day to all strong women in the Church and society who are writing their wonderful eulogies.

Rev Devon Dick is pastor of the Boulevard Baptist Church in St Andrew. He is author of ‘The Cross and the Machete’, and ‘Rebellion to Riot’. Send feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com.