Gordon Robinson | Assey versey condemnation

Apparently, channeling Russian activity in Ukraine constant bombardment of ‘Dancehall Music’ has escalated.

Condemnation by letter writers and talk-show callers, based on misconceived premises, are encapsulated in one headlined ‘Dancehall Music is to be Blamed for Behaviour of Young People’ by Garth Thompson ( The Gleaner, March 23, 2022):

“After hearing what caused the dispute that led to [a student’s] death and how popular guard rings have become among youngsters, it left me wondering where [they] get most of their influence.”

Me, Teacher! Me, Teacher! I know. Parents; teachers; friends. Right? Apparently not:

“I remember my days [1998-2003] in school [when] music influenced my thinking and behaviour. It was an all-boys school. Dancehall music was popular among the students.”

Sorry Garth, ‘Dancehall music’ has been popular among students since I was born in 19.. (mumble, mumble). Firstly, ‘Dancehall’ is neither beat nor rhythm. Due to curricula deficiency in music education, the phrase has become synonymous with modern reggae. But Dancehall began as the place Jamaicans went to listen to sound systems playing music ignored by sanitized, foreign-music-oriented radio stations. Irie FM was created to specifically address that inequity.

So ‘Dancehall Music’ was music not played on radio.

“I can remember distinctly how our behaviour at school was influenced by what was acceptable and unacceptable, according to dancehall artiste.”

DWL. No, Garth. My sainted grandmother would say you have it ‘assey versey’. It was people’s (including students’) behaviour that influenced Dancehall artistes. Do you really believe 1990s Dancehall artistes invented slack and violent lyrics? Then taught us? Seriously?

“When you look at the music of that era, you realise that while artistes were still saying what older artistes were saying, the content became far more explicit.”

Sigh. Ok Garth, let’s look at 1968, when you may believe music content was subtle. That’s the year legendary producer-singer-songwriter Cecil Bustamante Campbell (Prince Buster) pre-released Wreck a P** P** (to the tune of Little Drummer Boy). Will Gleaner publish his ‘non-explicit’ lyrics?

“Tonight I want to wreck a p** p**

A fat, fat girl to wreck a p** p**

And if she’s ugly, I don’t mind

I’m feeling fit and fine to wine

So I want a grind, I want a grind, Lord

When yu tear a p** p**.”

Not even I dare reproduce more of that one. In short order, The Soul Sisters replied with the equally explicit Wreck a Buddy! Buster released many more, including an explicitly irreverent ‘cover’ of Doris Day’s Que Sera.

In 1966, the Heptones’ Fatty Fatty was banned from radio for explicit lyrics.

“I need a fat girl

(fat girl tonight)

I’m in the mood girl

I need some food

I’m feeling rude

I say now, when you feel it girl

You gonna say it’s (so nice)

I know you want it

(want it tonight)

And you gonna get a lot of it

(get it tonight)

Get it galore.”

Anybody seeing the great Leroy Sibbles perform Fatty Fatty in concert can’t doubt its meaning. Believe me, Garth, King Yellowman (another awesome live performer) did NOT invent ‘slackness’.

On the violent-lyrics front, 1960s music glorified ‘rude boys’. Music legends Desmond Dekker and the Aces’ 007:

“And now rude boys a go wail

‘Cause dem outta jail

Rude boys cannot fail

‘Cause dem mus’ get bail.

Dem a loot, dem a shoot, dem a wail!”

The Clarendonians’ Rudie Bam Bam (by Peter Austin) also advised rude boys were invulnerable to justice:

Jus’ as him get bail

him gone back to jail

jus’ as him get jail

him bail again

What a bam bam!

In 1965, the Wailers hit back with musical commentary rarely heard on radio (but available at Casa Tout) called Hooligan Ska (aka Holligan):

“Listen, loud lover, and understand

Don’t play like a donkey if you’re really a man

You don’t fool a soul if you wear sharp studs

Your mouth is dutty and you cuss a bad word

Hooligans, hooligans, make up your minds.”

I’ve been telling you for years that Dancehall music is nothing more than artistic reflection of REAL society. That has been the process since Adam was a boy. If you don’t like ‘dancehall’, you don’t like society. FIX SOCIETY.

Peace and Love!

Gordon Robinson is an attorney-at-law. Email feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com.