Gordon Robinson | Scandal after scandal

Keep your windows boarded, doors shut, and children safe.

What’s up you ask? Hurricane coming? No, worse. It’s an Old Ball and Chain on the warpath!

Old BC: None of you listen to Old Grey Balls. He’s hopeless. I’m sick and tired of the lot of them.

Old GB: The lot of who?

Old BC: Who do you think? Politicians, of course!

Old GB: OK. Which ones?

Old BC: All! They’re pretty much all the same everywhere.

Old GB: Yes. But somebody must have upset you today. Or has the cost of your daily shopping gone up?

Old BC: If I didn’t shop, you wouldn’t have any clothes to wear and would go around frightening children. So don’t be cute. Yours not to reason why; yours but to sigh and buy!! Politicians come to electorates pretending to be sooooo concerned about us but, when they’re elected, it’s all about them. Narcissists!

Old GB: Isn’t that’s a tad harsh?

Old BC: Harsh? What are you drinking? Look at the current circus in England. Conservative MPs supported Boris despite scandal after scandal, including his being the first British PM guilty of breaking the law, as long as their posts were safe. As soon as the Party lost two by-elections in ‘safe’ seats they turn against him, using his comparatively minor offence of lying about knowing of a Minister’s perverted behaviour as a fake straw breaking fake camels’ backs. What the Freak? He alone knew? Did THEY know? If not, why not?

Old GB: They’ve been perennial Boris enablers while he claimed stupidity or senility (he ‘forgot’ or didn’t understand ‘party’), rather than admit fault. So, current falling on swords, claiming protection of personal ‘integrity’, is just more narcissistic hypocrisy. Or, as Labour Party Leader Keir Starmer quipped: “This is the first case of sinking ships fleeing the rat!”

Old BC: Look at how these it’s-all-about-me charlatans behaved. One by one they resign, saying they can’t work with Boris. Then when he announces resignation as Party Leader, but staying as PM until Conservatives elect a new Party Leader, they trip over their egos begging back their jobs.

Old GB: WHAT??

Old BC: Did I stutter? Sara Britcliffe, former Parliamentary Private Secretary in the education department, resigned Wednesday. Thursday she’s on BBC TV saying she’ll return, allegedly so “government continues.” But, on Wednesday, she said government can’t continue under Boris. Nadhim Zahawi, now Boris’ new Chancellor of the Exchequer, replacing resigned Rishi Sunak, is worse. Zahawi, a front-runner to replace Boris, was one of the first to advise Boris to resign. Yet he jumps at an opportunity for a high- profile post in Boris’ new cabinet to boost his political aspirations. Yuck!

Old GB: Holy machinations, Batman! Boris’ siege mentality, including disgraceful late-night sacking of Michael Gove, was eerily reminiscent of something he wrote in the Telegraph four days after the 2010 general election delivered a hung parliament. Then, BoJo castigated Gordon Brown for clinging to power:

“The whole thing is unbelievable. As I write these words, Gordon Brown is still holed up in Downing Street. He’s like some illegal settler in the Sinai desert, lashing himself to the radiator or David Brent haunting The Office in that excruciating episode when he refuses to acknowledge he has been sacked. Isn’t there someone, the Queen’s Private Secretary, the nice policeman on the door of No, 10, whose job it is to tell him the game is up?”

Old BC: Jamaican MPs are no better. Stop, look and listen to the Parliamentary hullaballoo over proposed amendments to the Integrity Act. MPs complained about being singled out because the Commission wanted additional scrutiny of MPs. The cry from poor, downtrodden MPs was, why us? What about the rest of the public service? Our influence is limited.

Old GB: DWL. Limited?

Old BC: NOW I’m boiling. MPs, especially those doubling as ministers, treat public officials as minions. Now they want to hide behind the thin veil of public service responsibility? Maybe if MPs didn’t insist on being ‘consulted’ in government contract awards or ‘relief packages’ distribution, instead of staying in their lanes as parliamentary representatives, they might have a point. The sad fact is, pervasive voter apathy highlights voter distrust. Attempting to avoid scrutiny, despite a history of scandal after scandal, only increases distrust. It’s not a good look. What do they have to hide?

I always insist on the last word.

Old GB: Yes dear.

Peace and Love.

Gordon Robinson is an attorney-at-law. Email feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com.