Gordon Robinson | Dumb and dumber!

Jamaica’s politics seems to be descending into a crass contest among spokespersons saying the dumbest things in the dumbest ways.

It gets worse. Hardcore followers, brainwashed to see and blind, hear and deaf, and speak only in worshipful tones, actually applaud this squirm-inducing skirmish.

Take, for example, PM’s most recent exhortation to underpaid, under-valued overwhelmed public servants to not allow low pay to affect service. He called public service workers’ mindset “one of the issues” preventing what he called “the mainstreaming of excellence”.

Explaining, he said “in the back of the mind of the public-sector worker…there’s a sense that I’m not being paid enough to deliver the service that’s expected of me.”

Ya think? Now why shouldn’t they think this way? They see MPs/ministers living very comfortable lives, yet trying to block lifestyle scrutiny by the Integrity Commission; bawling IN PARLIAMENT about low MP salaries AND budgeting gazillions to build a new parliament for their comfort.

This isn’t the first or second time PM has exposed this bee in his bonnet about “unreasonable” public-sector demands for a livable wage. On May 12, at the official installation of St Andrew Custos Ian Forbes, he warned against “action” by public-sector workers during salary negotiations that would dislocate Jamaica’s growth path:

“It’s not logical…I urge reason.”

From as far back as November 15, 2018, at a National Competitiveness Council meeting, PM blamed the “bureaucracy” for being an obstacle to growth because it was “process-driven”, rather than embracing outcomes to deliver service.

Gotcha, PM! It’s civil servants’ fault. If only you had a new parliament building you’d pass laws forcing them to work hard and aid growth. Right?

Is this why it’s taken Government six years (and continuing) to ‘review’ public service compensation packages? Is this why the plan is to take away public service non-taxable allowances that cushioned the blow for decades? Is the plan to significantly increase tax deductions by rolling allowances into regular pay? That take-home may be “more” than before is a three-card-trick. If the same salaries included tax-free allowances, take-home pay would be even more than the likkle ‘more’ now being trumpeted.

So, I propose public servants urge MPs not to use inadequate remuneration or lack of facilities as an excuse for their abysmally poor service. Tell them to suck it up and “mainstream excellence” in parliament.

Instead of cauterizing the brain drain by offering significantly increased public service remuneration, the finance minister jumps up, before this interminable ‘review’ is complete, and announces (just in time for our 60th Anniversary ‘celebrations’), that Government INTENDS to increase maternity leave; and INTENDS to introduce vague paternity leave benefits.

Of course, neither has actually been done, but already there’s an almighty twitter squabble about whose idea it was. PNP, like any five-year-old child, claims paternity.

“Dem t’ief wi idea,” PNP whined. “It’s mine. MINE!”

The nadir was a tweet by Floyd Morris:

“PNP spokespersons have a plethora of ideas to transform Jamaica, but we are very cautious in releasing most of them to the public because of fear of the copycats. Our 2020 Manifesto is now a raiding ground for the Government, with no acknowledgement of the source.”

STOP THE DUMB FINGER-POINTING

What the blurdeeps scurdeeps! Really? Seriously? FEAR of copycats? PNP hides viable solutions to Jamaica’s problems because it’s AFRAID somebody might copycat AND (horror of horrors) claim credit? Say it ain’t so! Is PNP for us or for PNP? RIGHT HERE is proof, Jamaican politics is auditioning to replace Jim Carrey or Jeff Daniels.

Why should we care about the comfort of players of hide-and-seek in an old parliament building when many police stations remain dilapidated (some with appalling sanitary conditions), many schools are ramshackle (some with pit latrines) ,and some hospitals don’t even have working air conditioning units? New parliament building? To accomplish WHAT? More desk-banging, insult-hurling games? KMT!

When Debt GDP is 75 per cent, we can build a new parliament. When inflation AND interest rates are manageable, we can build a new parliament. When education outcomes and garbage collections are high but murder rates low, we can build a new parliament.

When public health facilities “mainstream excellence”, we can build a new parliament. When parliament is no longer government’s rubber stamp and we SEE positive results from parliamentary work, we can build a new parliament.

Until then, stop the dumb finger-pointing. Stop taking Shaggy’s advice. It WAS you. It. Is. You! Get cracking on your real jobs.

Peace and Love!

Gordon Robinson is an attorney-at-law. Email feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com.