Garth Rattray | Society’s hypocrisy on pregnancy and motherhood

The story of my birth began with the intervention of my [paternal] aunt. She had become pregnant at the tender age of 15, and gave birth at 16. As I understood it, the realisation of her pregnancy was the source of much family distress and ‘grief’. It was thought that her life was over, and that she was doomed to suffer a non-productive future plagued by being tied down by an unplanned child and a derailed education.

The child’s father [initially] denied all responsibility and turned his back on her. The conundrum of what to do with the ‘situation’ caused a lot of stirring and disquiet in the family. It was a poor family that was already struggling desperately to survive. My aunt’s only sibling was her brother, my father. It was he who voluntarily took up the mantle and assumed the responsibility of taking care of his pregnant sister, and eventually her newborn baby.

When my mother went into labour, the doctor and nurse in charge of the delivery centre were both of the opinion that she would not deliver until the following morning. Consequently, when I was making my entrance into this world, it was that same aunt who delivered me. By the time that I was born, my aunt had gone back to school, and had eventually embarked on a course of study to become a midwife … lucky for me!

ONLY CHILD

Later on in life, my aunt got married. It turns out that her daughter was the only child that she ever had. That child, my cousin, became a lawyer of note, migrated to the United States of America, and served as public defender in New York. She, in turn, had three children, all of who turned out to be productive adults. One of those children also became a lawyer and at one time served as a federal prosecutor. That one unplanned pregnancy resulted in one child, three grandchildren and five great-grandchildren (so far).

Because of my personal beliefs and because of that profound family history, I do my best to dissuade women (and girls) from terminating their unplanned pregnancies. I have seen innumerable females who despair because of an unexpected, and inconvenient pregnancy. So far, none of those who decided to keep their pregnancy have regretted it. And, conversely, those who decided not to go ahead with the pregnancy often end up wondering what that child would have turned out to be, and express various degrees of regret.

I am not totally opposed to women who need to terminate their pregnancy; however, there ought to be specified circumstances. Our laws that address abortion need amending. They treat a zygote (a newly fertilised egg) as if it were already a [sentient] human being. Biologically, it only has the potential to become a human being. Sometimes our anti-abortion law leads to serious physical and/or significant mental endangerment of the mother.

Our laws go to great lengths to protect newly fertilised human eggs (zygotes), but do not protect fully developed human foetuses or recently delivered human babies that are still tethered to their mothers by their umbilical cord, and have not yet taken their first breath. They are treated like non-entities. This explains why people who kill a pregnant woman and consequently also kill her full-term, viable, unborn foetus, can only be charged with one homicide. I can’t understand the focus on a potential for human life and the concomitant ignoring of a perfectly healthy and viable little human being.

MIXED MESSAGES

Our society’s flagrant chagrin and hostile admonition of some women/girls who decide to keep their unforeseen/unplanned pregnancies send mixed messages. I clearly remember what happened when one of our reigning beauty queens became pregnant. The acerbic comments roared down the towering hypocritic, holier-than-thou metaphoric mountain faster and hotter than any pyroclastic flow. The beauty queen did what other youngsters do, but became pregnant. She decided to do the right thing by keeping her pregnancy. Ostensibly, hypocrites would have preferred if she hid her pregnancy, terminated it and carried on as if nothing had happened.

Females become pregnant because of a wide variety of reasons including wanting to become pregnant, negligence, ignorance, failed contraception, or ‘rape’. Thankfully, there are several organisations that will significantly assist young women to get back on track. The Women’s Health Network’s adolescent health programme is very good at that.

And so, on Christmas Day 2022, a 14-year-old was the first mother to deliver at the Victoria Jubilee Hospital. She gave birth to a pair of premature boys. As is customary, their arrival was celebrated and publicised. This was the most heart-warming paragraph in the article, “Speaking with The Gleaner, the minor (name withheld), mentioned that she was scared when she initially found out about her unexpected pregnancy and that her parents were also disappointed as well. However, she was glad to have her parent’s support, especially from her mother, throughout this difficult time and vowed to make the best of the situation, as she did not want to get an abortion, and return to school when able.”

The Gleaner article sparked fierce debates. In my opinion, since she is under the legal age of consent, her situation should not have been made public. She should have been given her gifts in private and immediate steps taken to usher her and her babies into a safe, secure, and bright future.

Garth A. Rattray is a medical doctor with a family practice. Send feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com and garthrattray@gmail.com.