Single But Iffy to Mingle | Playing fire with 'Ghosts'

We're cautioned as children not to play with fire or else we'll get burned. Then, why as adults do we run towards blazing flames, hoping to escape an incinerated situation unscathed? Welcome to Single but iffy to Mingle. Just joining me? This roller-coaster affair started with heartbreak and is riding its way into new and exciting adventures. So, without further ado, let's continue.

Dating has had its fair share of ups and downs so far. And somehow, the biggest hurdle of them all is actually getting a man to ask me out or agree to an outing. One of the beautiful things about the concept, however, is discovering where the individual journey takes you. In layman terms - seeing multiple people. No, it is not a competition, it is merely a process of knowing - the weak will wither and the strong will survive.

Those familiar with this series will remember a few names I am about to mention - I will also be introducing someone new (twirls in excitement). And since the festive season is fast approaching, I will kick things off by telling you my own fiery stories of the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Christmas Present, and Christmas Future.

Ghost of Christmas Past

Mr Surreal and I have always had an intense connection. Even as friends, there was this simmering fire just waiting to unleash. We've been in a relationship before, so we're second nature to each other. If I'm in a jam, he's a message or a phone call away. He's going through his battles, I'm right there fighting with him. We have always had this unspoken level of understanding and we can always go to the other about anything. He's super respectful whenever I'm taken. And he's supportive when I am picking up broken pieces. And the intimacy is amazing! Recently, he became a member of the singles club. And call me Cupid, I saw this as an opportunity to rekindle our fire. Boy, was I wrong! Here's the problem with his fire. It is only suitable for occasions like camping, to keep you warm and cosy. But you never carry a campfire home, can you? Enough said.

Ghost of Christmas Present

Which brings me to the Ghost of Christmas Present: Mr Charmer. He was handsome and as the name suggested, very charming. He came out strong, too. All sweet on me with his versed cutesy vocabulary. The dilemma was and continues to be: he only has words going for him. Who was I to hold a busy schedule against him? I'm no saint in that department. So I stuck around, hoping to get a little one-on-one time. Days and weeks passed. No real progress. Then one day, I came into a bit of luck and briefly saw him. The fire between us was undeniable, sparking irresistible flames. I thought it would continue to burn bright and spread like wild fire once we crossed that particular meeting hurdle. But he fell right back into the spell of his busy schedule. We haven't actually gone out on a date and I've noticed that if I don't call or text, he doesn't either. So, is this the warning sign of a fire hazard? Was our meeting so electrifying that it created a short circuit? I've done this busy dance once before and it ended up being a solo act.

Ghost of Christmas Future

Once upon a time, a boy meets girl. He finds her so fascinating that he wants to learn more. This was the tale of Mr Special K. He is no ordinary man. And literally came out of nowhere! Once we started talking, we spoke often about everything. He stimulated my intellect in ways I could not have imagined. Conversations were thought-provoking but effortless. When it came to the physical, he kept it simple: we would go out as friends and see where it took us. My work got in the way of our first date, and I had to postpone it. He was disappointed and so was I. However, I made it up to him the next evening, and I'm so glad I did. It went so well. He was a complete gentleman, holding doors, letting me go first. Laughter became the medicine we needed to forget about the hectic day. And our verbal banter went on for hours without us knowing where the time went. Since then, getting to know each other has been smooth sailing. Kind, smart, witty, genuine, caring, charming, and thoughtful, he sports an amazing smile as the icing to his sweet cake. Steering my waves of desire by igniting a pure, unadulterated fire, he reflected a different light - a candle light, releasing romantic scents of happiness. Melting away at the 'I was thinking about you' calls or the 'Did you eat?' texts became my new order of the day. A man of his word, he sets a date, he makes it. He misses it, he makes up for it. And his touch. Oooh! It continues to send chills up and down my spine - how's that for starting a fire? Is there a future here? Maybe. But it's too early to tell. Until then, I'm enjoying these little moments that are such a big deal, and in his words, seeing where it goes.

krysta.anderson@gleanerjm.com