SEX, LIES & DESPERATE LOVE LIVES PART 6: I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND

The Bible gives us some guidelines about how we should approach dating and there are some questions you may want to ask if you want God's best for your dating life. The best way to begin a dating relationship is to think about the end result and to ask yourself some tough questions on the front end.

Let's look at the four decisions that you should make before dating.

1 Know what I am looking for: If you set your standards based on what is right, what I have found is that God works best with those standards.

One of the most controversial verses in the Bible is "Don't become partners with those who reject God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong?" 2 Corinthians 6:14 MSG

When some people read this verse, they say the Bible discriminates against unbelievers. However, the Bible constantly expresses God's love for all people and His desire for relationship with us. You can't always control who you fall in love with if you don't set early boundaries; and then when you find that there isn't a match between your beliefs and theirs, you would have set yourself up for some difficult times in that relationship. So what's the solution? Determine your spiritual compatibility on the front end; if the person's faith doesn't match yours, then take caution. But don't lower the standards.

We should also ask, 'Is this person a person of integrity?' Sometimes, just because a person is a Christian, it doesn't mean that every area of their life has been brought under the control of Christ, and there can be issues of integrity. A person who lacks integrity in a dating relationship is not going to suddenly change in marriage apart from supernatural circumstances over which you have no control. Don't settle in the area of integrity; set your standards high.

2 Know my ultimate goal: What is your ultimate goal for the relationship, and are they the same as God's? God has two ultimate goals for your dating relationship:

a) Marriage - When you are dating someone, you should evaluate the relationship periodically and ask yourselfis this someone I would marry? To properly assess the answer to this question, it takes patience. But too many of us are tempted to push the relationship too fast. However, the Bible says that one of the marks of true love is patience? "Love is patient." I Corinthians 13:4

b) Growth - God wants you to grow, not only emotionally, but spiritually, inside of every relationship. Are you growing together in this relationship? Is this a relationship that pulls you up and grows you both closer to God? From I Thessalonians 3:12, we see that the goal for a relationship is that the Lord would make your love grow and overflow to each other and to everyone else.

3 Know how far you will go: Set physical boundaries. If you want God to honour your dating relationship, then you have to honour God in the physical relationship. "Don't let any part of your body become tools used for sinning. But give yourself completely to God." Romans 6:13 TLB. The Bible teaches that premarital sex is wrong. Randy Acorn in The Purity Principle, says, "Since sexual intercourse before marriage is wrong, it is also wrong to engage in any activity that propels mind and body toward it. So it's not too late to set the boundaries now."

4 Know that God wants the very best for your life: If you concentrate on the relationship you have with God, and you make sure that takes top priority, then you can be assured that you will experience God's best in every other area of your life. God's best is that sex is designed for maximum fulfilment inside of marriage. So are you going to trust God's best or settle for something less?

"God will give you everything you need from day to day if you give Him first place in your life and live as He wants you to." Matthew 6:33

God wants to give you everything you need. This is true when it comes to your spiritual needs and your relational needs as well as your physical needs. Are you going to give God control? Are you going to give God first place in the dating relationship?