Picturesque Port Maria
Published:Tuesday | November 2, 2010 | 12:00 AM
I really like Port Maria in St Mary. I'm not sure what it is, but I really do. For me, Port Maria feels like a whole different country, or at least, Jamaica as it was a long, long time ago. Many of the buildings there still have that quaint look, and because the streets are so narrow I feel like I've journeyed back in time whenever I'm there.
But as much as I love Port Maria, not everyone there likes me. An unfathomable assertion, I know. But, it appears to be true. Just ask 'Statue Man' the figurine vendor who approached me for a sale on a recent sunny afternoon.
"Wah gwaan, bossy?" he yelled from across a busy street in the centre of the town. I didn't, at first, realise he was talking to me. So I only glanced in his direction, then looked away, paying more attention to the taxis zipping back and forth only a few feet in front of me.
"Bossy, figurine?" I heard the shout again and looked up. This time, the man holding the small statues of dogs and cats was looking straight at me. I declined with a wave but he started walking toward me anyway. The man holding the figurines wore baggy jeans and what looked like combat boots. He skipped through traffic and was in front of me in a matter of seconds.
He held up a brown and white figurine made in the shape of a dog. The eyes were painted red and the mouth was a crudely drawn circle. It looked like it had been possessed by some sort of statue-dog demon.
"Figurine, bossy?" he asked. He had a raspy voice. I declined, again.
The man let his hands fall to his sides, still clutching the figurines.
"Wah? So weh yuh say? My pickney dem fi dead fi hungry? Ah dat yuh want?" he asked, looking annoyed.
I was caught off guard and really didn't know how to respond. "Huh?" was the best I could come up with.
Statue Man scowled. "Is alright man. One ah these days," he said before storming off.
I must have looked as bewildered as I felt because soon after, there was a reassuring call from behind.
"Cho, never mind Statue Man, yuh hear. Is so him gwaan."
It was a woman with a friendly face and short hair. She was about 50 years old and had plump cheeks.
She pointed in the direction Statue Man was walking. "Is a likkle lunatic when him ready yuh hear," she said, chuckling.
The woman told me her name was Jackie. She was sitting behind a small table laden with notebooks, pencils and erasers.
She saw me looking at them. "Pencil and school book mi selling today," she said.
I asked her how business was going. "Well, mi have to give thanks in the name of Jehovah, because it could be worse," said Jackie.
She asked me if it was my first time in Port Maria. I assured her it wasn't and mentioned how much I liked the place.
"Tee hee!" she chuckled. "Is true, di place nice fi real. Mi used to was living in Kingston with a family but mi never like it," said Jackie.
"Mi used to take care of di house and ting, so mi used to stay in mi own room and everything. Up there did nice, but mi did miss mi home too much."
I grinned. "True, true!" said Jackie. "Mi feel like mi leave Jamaica and gone ah some different place. Everybody just act different ah town. Mi never like it," she said.
"When Port Maria sea breeze lick yuh, yuh nuh want nothing else inna life. It have it bad side too, but we haffi give thanks fi dem likkle ting deh," said Jackie.
Feedback
The following are some of the feedback letters from readers of last week's edition of Roving with Lalah.
Dear Robert,
I really enjoy reading your adventures across Jamaica. I left Jamaica over 30 years ago and never heard of many of these places. But, I can relate because I grew up in a district similar to many of those places. The way you relate the stories, it's like I'm right there with someone in my district. Keep up the good work and keep the laughs coming.
- Melissa
Dear Robert,
Another job well done. I will definitely have to get in touch with you the next time I am in Jamaica and maybe go on one of these trips with you. I haven't been to Jamaica in 12 years and I miss it badly.
- Waboops
Dear Robert,
I truly enjoy your weekly excursions into 'real' Jamaica. Although the stories are familiar, they make me quite aware of how much of the island is foreign to me. Here's to the next episode.
- Carl D Sterling