Let's talk Life: Help! I am stressed

Yvonnie Bailey- Davidson, Contributor

Dear Counsellor:

I am a teenager and finds life to be very stressful. I live with my mother and smaller brother. My father is married with younger children, and I hardly correspond with him. School is rather stressful, and I am failing in some subjects. I feel like a failure and I am demotivated.

- Monique

Dear Monique:

You need to change your thought from negative to positive. Talk to your mother about your feelings. You may speak to your guidance counsellor or pastor about the issues you are faced with. Many people, including teenagers are feeling stressed and demotivated. There are several ways to deal with stress, and each individual must find the way that suits him or her. Living in the here and now is essential. Sometimes we worry about the past and the future and cannot enjoy the present. Some things are beyond our control, and you need to realise this. It is normal to be concerned about your grades, and to work hard to improve them.

Seeing a therapist is a good thing as certain issues can be dealt with. We need to assess your academic skills. Improving your study schedule, and completing assignments on time will go a long way to improving your grades. Each day is a day to do some work. Last-minute cramming is not good. You need to learn the material ahead of time so that you are relaxed on the day of examination. Set questions for yourself and ask the teachers to mark them.

You have some family issues, namely a single parent and absentee father. Single mothers have it very hard to take care of children. Does your father provide financial assistance?

Positive thinking is important even though things look gloomy. It is very important to count your blessings and give God thanks for what He has provided.

I am old and lonely

Dear Counsellor:

I am 80 years old and live alone. I attend church and attend to my daily activities. My children are overseas, and we correspond quite often. I, however, feel lonely sometime and wish for a companion.

- Margaret

Dear Margaret:

There are several ways to deal with your problems. You can rent a part of the house to screen tenants or get a live-in helper. The other option is to move to a retirement home. These homes have active seniors who take care of their businesses, and keep each other company. There are day programmes for the elderly, and these can occupy your time. You may meet a suitable partner at these centres or at church.

Email questions for Dr Yvonnie Bailey-Davidson to yvonniebd@hotmail.com or call 978-8602.