Let's talk LIFE: I want to lose weight

Yvonnie Bailey- Davidson, Gleaner Writer

Dear Counsellor,

I have a problem with my weight. I have tried exercise and diet with little success. What can you suggest?

- Nora

Dear Nora,

Weight management is a lifelong consistent way of living. It requires us to have a detailed look at our behaviour, emotions, spirituality and nutrition. We also need to look at our activities and assess our need for physical routines.

It is important to examine our feelings and deal with anger, jealousy, hatred, disappointment and resentment. These issues are important as we feed ourselves as a coping mechanism to dealing with emotions. It would be informative to do a weekly inventory of your feelings and your eating behaviour. You would identify times when you do emotional eating and times when you starve yourself. People eat to reward themselves and refuse food as punishment. If you are feeling deprived of food you may overeat. You therefore need to look for patterns and rituals that trap you to eat more than you should. See a therapist to work on self-esteem, anger and other emotions.

You need to first love yourself before you can love others. Treat yourself with respect, care and nurture your body. You may be overweight now, but you need to set goals for weight loss and weight maintenance. Set small goals for weight loss like five pounds and work towards it. As you achieve your weight loss, set more goals to lose more weight. Make a commitment to yourself to walk for half an hour each day and try and keep to your goal.

Get a massage regularly and drink plenty of water. Eat small portions and cut down on the use of oils and fat. See a dietitian to discuss food substitution and calories.

My child is performing poorly in school

Dear Counsellor,

My daughter is not doing well in high school. She did well in grade six, but is not getting high grades in high school. I supervise the homework and help her to revise for examinations. I am going to get a psycho-educational assessment to identify her weaknesses and her strengths.

- Akalia

Dear Akalia

Failure at the high-school level can be due to several things. Many children learn well in small class sizes with individual help from the teacher. She may need to be organised at school, and need to focus and concentrate. Sometimes learning problems surface in high school because of how the school is structured.

Class sizes are big and the curriculum has to be completed in a set time. Your daughter will need individual attention in several subjects. She will need the help of a teacher to help her learn study skills and examination techniques. It is important to get your child assessed to identify problems like attention deficit disorder or learning disorder. She may be having emotional problems or anxiety disorders. Sometimes it is the difficulties in making the transition from preparatory or primary to high school. It is good that you supervise homework and revision.

Discuss with the therapist ways to increase her grades. You will need to pay for extra lessons.

Email questions and feedback for Dr Yvonnie Bailey-Davidson to yvonniebd@hotmail.com or call 978-8602.