Let's talk LIFE
Published:Saturday | December 17, 2011 | 12:00 AM
Yvonnie Bailey- Davidson, Contributor
Unstable teen
Unstable teen
Dear Counsellor,
My teenage son is having difficulties at school. His grades fluctuate and he seems to be unsettled. He studies, but does not seem to be working hard enough. When he was in primary school he did fairly well.
- Johanna
Dear Johanna,
Your son needs to be evaluated for learning problems. His strengths and weaknesses will be evaluated. Many times, children do not understand what they are taught. Sometimes they are afraid to ask for help. Schoolwork is difficult and children need extra help. Mathematics and English are the foundations of learning. They need to grasp the basics from grades seven to nine. Children need a good foundation and to be consistent in their studies. Your son needs a study timetable, along with his books. He needs a dictionary to help him check the spelling of words. Reading is important, and he should be reading widely to enhance his essay writing. He should hand in all pieces of homework and recheck his work when it is returned to him. He should practise entering competitions to help build confidence and vocabulary.
It is important to assess whether you son has chronic depression or suffers from anxiety. These conditions can influence your son negatively. He may lack interest and focus and find school boring and uninspiring. Adolescence is a time when children question life and need guidance from parents or significant others. This is the time when they experiment with drugs and do little schoolwork. Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder tends to worsen during this period, and so the grades fluctuate. He may have a need for extra love and attention, and this should be given.
Bullying at school
Dear Counsellor,
My daughter is fat and is teased by her schoolmates. She is refusing to go to school, and so each morning she gets a headache.
- Mindy
Dear Mindy,
It is always unkind to call individuals nicknames and jeer at them. Children can be cruel towards their peers. Weight management is a booming business and people have tried many different diets without much success. Obesity is on the rise and children and adolescents are affected. Weight management is a multidisciplinary process. There is the paediatrician, the therapist, the nutritionist, and the priest.
Bullying has become a very serious issue and we are looking for ways to tackle the problem. Some students like to tease others and students are given nicknames which last for a lifetime. A proverb says 'what is joke to you is death to me'. Speak to the class teacher and the principal about bullying in the school. Also speak with the guidance counsellor about ways of dealing with bullying. A lot of bullying takes place on the playground and so supervision of the students is important. Bullying is a societal problem which requires a national approach as well as a school and family approach.
Encourage your daughter to go to school. Tell her that God loves her and she is special. It is painful to be the butt of jokes and some children need counselling. Let the paediatrician evaluate the headaches.
Email questions and feedback for Dr Yvonnie Bailey-Davidson to yvonniebd@hotmail.com or call 978-8602.