Doctor's Advice:Am I losing my manhood?

Q.  Doctor, I am real worried that I may be losing my nature. I am a guy of 22, and I must admit that I have a pretty busy sex life. I have a girlfriend in the Corporate Area, and another in St James. I have affairs with other women quite often. And currently, I am involved with an older, married lady in Spanish Town. As you can guess, I travel a lot in my work. Well, to be frank with you, Doc, recently I have found that it has become difficult for me to have sex twice in an evening. You see, when I was younger, maybe five or six years back, I could easily have sex several times per night. And until recently, I would always expect that after having intercourse with a girl, I would be ready to 'do it again' in an hour or so. But now that is not always happening, Doc. The other night, I had sex with my Kingston girlfriend at around 8 p.m. Afterwards, she got up and cooked us a meal. Then, at maybe 9 o'clock, I expected that I would be able to have intercourse with her again. But I couldn't. I got an erection, and then I lost it. I was so embarrassed that I pretended I was ill, and said I had to go back to my hotel. Doctor, why is this happening to me? Is it the first sign that I am becoming impotent?

A. Before I answer your question, can I just point out that you are leading a pretty dangerous lifestyle. You seem to have two regular girlfriends, plus a number of 'occasional' ones in various parts of the island. And recently, you have started an affair with a married woman in Spanish Town.

The risks are obvious. You may catch a sexually transmitted infection, such as chlamydia, which is now so common among young adults. Much more seriously, you might get HIV.

In addition, you could make any of these partners pregnant. And as for the married lady in Spanish Town, what will happen if her husband finds out about you? Please bear in mind that betrayed spouses sometimes turn violent!

OK, now let us turn to your query. When you were a teenager, you used to be able to have sex several times in an evening. That is extremely common in young males aged around 16 or so. I have even encountered cases where youths of that age were on some occasions able to orgasm six times in a night.

But what you have not realised is this, it is normal for guys to find that their capacity for repeated intercourse grows less as they get just a little older. American sex researchers have shown that in males, the capacity for multiple orgasm starts declining after about the age of 16.

So by the early 20s, a lot of men cannot easily make love a second time until they have had at least a couple of hours rest. But not all guys are the same, and some can recover a lot quicker than others.

One final point: it occurs to me that you are probably tiring yourself out as a result of having all these sex partners in various towns. If you cut down on the number of partners, you might be able to recover quicker. You would also be safer.

Q.  Doctor, I am female, aged 21. A friend has told me where period pain can be eased by orgasm. Is that correct?

A. Yes, research has shown that menstrual pain can be eased by having an orgasm. However, if your period pains are bad, you should certainly see a doctor.

Q. Unfortunately, I was circumcised as a baby. Now I feel that the skin is very tight on my penis when it is erect. Can I take an operation to have the circumcision reversed?

A. No, I am afraid that there is no way of reversing a circumcision operation. A piece of skin has been removed from your organ, and that is that!

However, it would be technically possible for a skilled surgeon to take some skin from elsewhere on your body, and graft it on to your penis, thus making a new foreskin. But that would be a very difficult and expensive procedure.

There is an alternative which some young guys try in America. It involves regularly stretching the remaining skin, so that over a period of months or years, it gradually covers part of the head of the organ. For more information, please look at a good article called 'Foreskin Restoration' on Wikipedia.

Email questions to Doc at saturdaylife@gleanerjm.com and read more in the Outlook Magazine tomorrow.