Grumpy in HWT

Come on, let's get on with it! It was my own fault for getting caught in the Half-Way Tree area the weekend before schools reopened. This was always going to be crunch time for last-minute shoppers. But this twit who was holding up traffic was doing nothing more than trying to get the attention of a curvy woman standing nearby. Everyone behind him was forced to wait.

Beep! Beep! Angry drivers in vehicles behind his were prodding Casanova to move along, but he was too busy shouting sweet nothings to the woman. She, by the way, was showing no sign whatsoever of interest.

"Oy, man! Tap black up di road!" yelled a passenger in the vehicle behind the road blocker's. "She nuh want yuh! Look how yuh cyar placka-placka! Nuh woman nuh waan drive inna dat!"

People standing nearby burst out laughing and the curvy woman couldn't help but smile. The road blocker apparently felt embarrassed and gave up his pursuit, driving off without saying anything else. The line of cars started moving again.

Now it might have been the crowds, the expense, or the sheer stress of it all, but it appeared that most persons out that day were feeling grumpy. Scarcely a smiling face could be found among the masses moving in and out of stores.

I was standing near a bookshop. It was packed and a security guard was letting people in two at a time. A rather large woman wearing brown tights and a bright yellow blouse stepped out of the shop carrying a white plastic bag. Beside her was a boy about 10 years old. He looked bored. "Yuh see how much money mi just spend, pickney?" the woman said, looking angry. Her forehead was sweaty.

The boy didn't respond. "Eight thousand dollar," the woman shook the plastic bag at him as she spoke. "Dat mean seh if yuh evah get a next report like di last one weh yuh get, it nah go pretty! Yuh hear what mi seh, pickney? Anyhow yuh nuh buckle down dis year, ah worries!" she said. The boy's eyes widened, but he remained quiet.

"Come on! Shoes time," said the woman, walking off. The boy trailed her, his head down.

"Phone case?" a man with a raspy voice said. I turned to find him holding up a black case. I told him I didn't need one and he wheeled his cart of supplies away.

Everyting expensive

A man and woman were walking my way. They were middle-aged and seemed tired, perhaps worn out from shopping. The man was looking at a paper while the woman fanned herself with a rag. They stopped next to me. I said hello and they returned the greeting. I asked them if they were out getting school supplies. The man nodded and sighed. "Man, ah tell yuh," he said. The woman kept fanning herself. "Everyting just get expensive so. Cho! And den di crowd again."

The woman glared at the man, but he didn't seem to notice. He continued talking. "And di likkle money just gone before yuh get it. Di pay not even reach bank good yet and di pickney dem book just gone wid everything. Not even likkle nuh lef back."

This didn't sit well with the woman, who instantly stopped fanning herself. "Den nuh fi yuh pickney dem?" she yelled. Her companion seemed surprised by the outburst. "Is fi yuh pickney dem! Yuh must stop complain bout book price and know seh when yuh old, ah dem same one ah go tek care ah yuh," she said.

I looked at the man, who in turn looked at me, his eyes soliciting support. I wasn't about to get on the woman's bad side though, so I didn't say anything.

"All yuh do from morning is complain bout price, and yuh still haffi buy di book dem. Wah sense dat meck? Eh?" she said before turning and walking away. The man gave me one final look, as if to say, 'thanks for nothing', then chased after her.

A man wearing a cap and shorts came up to me and asked if I wanted to buy a schoolbag. I told him I didn't and he nodded. I asked him how sales were going. "Well not too bad, yuh know," he said. "It did better in days gone by, but we give thanks fi di likkle sale same way."

I mentioned how crowded the place was. "Yes man, so dat's why even though mi tired, mi can't go in till late into di night," he said. "What don't sell today nah sell again, so we have to put out wi all. Pickney nuh love back to school, but man like me know seh is di best time ah di year after Christmas."

Where should Robert go next? Let him know at robert.lalah@gleanerjm.com