Don't want no short, short man - Marying a shorter man has problems

Heather Little-White, Contributor

What if you were to fall in love with a man who is much shorter than you are? How would you deal with the height discrepancy and society's reaction to you as a couple? What are the issues for sexual intimacy? Men who are vertically challenged may not experience the joy of looking in the eyes of the beloved as he would, but they find ways around it and will date and marry taller women because of the other virtues they possess.

The stereotype is that women should marry tall, handsome men, and women who might find a devoted short partner will snob him and may end up not marrying anybody in the long run. Some women may be considered heightists - persons who discriminate based on height (Urban Dictionary).

Stumbling block

A man is considered short if he is outside the average height for a man, which is 5ft 8" to 5ft 11". Height should not be the only determining factor in starting a relationship. Several other characteristics are critical to liking someone whom you just met such as intelligence, sense of humour and some men are impressed with breast size. It is frustrating when height becomes a stumbling block in finding the right perfect partner. Some short men say that at times they feel small when dating taller women as instinctively they literally make you feel 'small' by their words and actions.

The reality though after you have become accustomed to your shorter partner, you union becomes second nature even when you go out and people will stare and make comments. Some couples with taller women and shorter men find that this combination always starts conversations at social functions as people are curious to know how the couple met and how they get along, even trying to pry into their intimate life.

No problem

Couples with taller women and much shorter men have learned to live comfortably with the height difference. Outlook asked some partners how they have been coping:

Mary: If that were all I had to worry about in the relationship, then there would be nothing to worry about. I have been married to a short man for 15 years and I could not find a better husband.

Arleen: I am engaged to a much shorter man and our relationship is fun because I dote on him a lot because I find him cute.

Jenice:It is a wonderful feeling to have a shorter man as my partner. We have no problems with the height difference and it actually makes our intimacy more exciting as we do things outside the ordinary.

Robin:My husband just loves my 6 ft height and he is the one who pursued the relationship ... at first I was turned off by his 5ft 6" height, but he proved to be a terrific guy in all areas of our relationship.

Benefits of
marrying a shorter man

Loveable
men: Short men are described by their partners as 'nice' with a
sunny disposition and are not abusive or intimidating. They are usually
honest and show respect to their women. Short men will go the extra
mile to compensate for their challenge in height. According to
www.collegehumour.com, short men are described as
having the Napoleon Complex, related to Napoleon, Emperor of France,
short in stature, who boldly attempted the invasion of Russia and other
countries of might. Women admire this bravado in short men and they are
ready for the conquest.

More
faithful: Short men make better companions and are more
faithful than taller men. Tall men are usually in demand and it said
that because they are conscious of their height and sometimes
accompanying good looks, they will have a series of flings before they
settle down and even in marriage, flirting will be a source of
continuous discord in the union. Studies have found that taller men are
more likely to marry more often and have more children
(www.heightsite.com). Since short men are not
considered traditionally attractive and will not be sought after, he too
will be more accepting of others.

Taller
children: There are several benefits to marrying a shorter
man. One of the benefits of marrying a shorter guy is that genetic
combinations can produce children over the average height for girls and
boys. For example, a woman who is 6ft 2" tall could produce son of 6ft
0" or a daughter of 5ft 8" if she marries a man who is 5ft
6".

Cost savings: If you are
accustomed to having tall men in your household, you would have learnt
that they eat three times more than everyone else in the household and
your grocery bill is enormous. Marrying a shorter man will provide
savings on the food bill as biologically a shorter man will require
fewer calories from foods consumed. If you trend down the height of
children by marrying a shorter man in the future, those shorter children
produced from the union will eat
less.

Better intimacy: Short men
are not at a disadvantage in romance. They will be in a better position
for some sexual activities like cunnilingus. It is said that short men
are part of the in-trend that compact is better as seen in technology
with small mp3 players and computers. During intimacy, short men will
use creative sex positions to satisfy their tall partners like 69,
spooning, sitting cross-legged and other creative options and clear
communications between each other to make them
work.

Negatives

Some people advise
that taller women stay away from shorter men because they will feel
intimidated by the woman's height, especially if she is a go-getter.
They often feel that their ego is crushed and will react in a way that
is dubbed 'short man mentality' in order to compensate for their
challenge in height. As such, they may be loud at times and may want to
bully their way through certain situations. However, with an
understanding partner who can constantly massage her spouse's ego, a
short man can be controlled on a leash by the woman he
loves.

Another compensation strategy is to purchase
huge assets in a house, car and gifts for his spouse and family. They
will buy expensive clothes and jewellery and dine at the finest
restaurants. Short men like to be kept in a communication loop at the
workplace and in their personal lives or they will take it personally
and change their disposition.

Wives of shorter men can
turn all the negatives of men to their advantage, embrace their other
assets, communicate and trust each other to develop an environment in
which love will flourish for the rest of their
lives.