Let's Talk Life - I stress, I eat

• I stress, I eat

Dear Counsellor,

I have a problem. Whenever I am stressed, I go for something to eat. I am gaining weight and don't know what to do.- Nicole

Dear Nicole,

Emotional eating is practised by many people. Food is comforting. Eating reminds us of those days when all our needs were taken care of by a parent or a caregiver. You should consider it normal to want to eat if you are emotional. The trick is to eat healthy, to eat small amounts and deal with the stress or emotions. We use food to fix feelings of anxiety, anger, or frustration.

Emotional eating tends to be a habit, and like any habit, it can be broken. Weight problems often run in families, so the easiest way to tackle emotional eating is together as a family.

Set up a healthy home environment. If there is no junk food in the house, then you can't eat it. Keep unprocessed, low-calorie, low-fat foods such as fresh fruits and vegetables. Children learn by watching adults, so parents need to set the example and create a healthier food environment. Before going grocery shopping, heading to a restaurant, or calling for pizza delivery, take a breather, go for a walk, and wait until your emotions are in check.

Know your triggers

Identify what is triggering your emotional eating. The next time you reach for comfort food, ask yourself, why do I want to eat? Am I really hungry? If not, try to identify what emotions you are feeling. Are you stressed, angry, bored, scared, sad, or lonely?

Keeping a food diary - a written record of what, how much and when you eat - may help you to see patterns in your eating and connections between mood and food. You may need to see a therapist to help you with these issues.

Celebrate success! Focus on the positive changes you are making one step at a time. You will get better results with positive encouragement than with harsh criticism. Changing an emotional eating habit is a process. Some backsliding will happen, so acknowledge when it does, and use that to help you plan how you will deal with a similar situation in the future.

When you work together as a family to develop better eating habits, the support you can offer each other and the rewards you enjoy can be priceless.

• Improving listening skills
  

Dear Counsellor, I would like some tips on improving the listening skills of my son. - Molly

Dear Molly,

One of the frustrations for teachers and parents is getting a child to stop, listen, and understand what is being taught or asked of him.

Keep things predictable. Be consistent with the words you use to give directions, and stick to established schedules in your household. This will increase a child's listening comprehension because he knows what to expect and feels secure and calm.

Show him what you want him to do. Go through the steps of a task. Check for understanding of directions. Check in with your son to make sure he isn't tuning out. Before, during, and after chores, homework, or a task, have your child tell you specifically what he is doing. This continuous reminder of the task at hand keeps your child focused. Help your child to recall information.

Email questions and feedback for Dr Yvonnie Bailey-Davidson to yvonniebd@hotmail.com or call 978-8602