Dear Doc:I gave my husband the Pill!

Doc, I am a woman who has done a wicked thing. Last month, I found out that my husband had cheated on me. I was so mad about it, that I took one of my contraceptive pills, crushed it up, and inserted it into his food.

Now I have forgiven him, and he has sworn never to see the other woman again. But I fear I have done him serious harm by putting a female pill into his food.

Relax. One contraceptive pill is not going to harm any man. The dose is far too small to be dangerous to him.

Indeed, some years ago, there used to be a male doctor in the United States who occasionally took a pill 'on air', to show how harmless it was. Now I am not suggesting that men should make a habit of taking the pill. But the one single one which you gave him cannot possibly hurt him.

It is good that you two seem to have settled your differences. Maybe a short course of marriage counselling would help you both even further.

Doc, I just cannot understand my family's attitude. Six months ago, I walked out on my husband because I had fallen deeply in love with a wonderful guy. Anyone who knows him immediately realises that he is incredibly charming and handsome.

He is also fantastic in the sack! He was the first man who ever made me orgasm, and with him, I find that I can have multiple orgasms and we are very happy together.

I have tried to treat my husband fairly. I have offered him a divorce, and I am contributing to the upkeep of our children. I make sure that I see them every weekend.

But my family just refuses to understand my situation. My mother calls me names, and my sister curses me. My husband's parents are worse. They will not speak to me, and I have been told that my mother-in-law is taking antidepressants. I have heard that she prays every day that I will go back to my husband. But there is no chance of that!

What I cannot understand, doc, is this: Why can these people not get their heads round the simple fact that I love my new man and he loves me? If I am happy about the new arrangement, why can't they be?

This is a sad situation for quite a lot of people, including your relatives and your husband's relatives. And you don't seem to have grasped that simple truth.

You see, when a marriage breaks down, it doesn't just affect the husband and wife. It also affects both their families. In particular, grandparents can become distressed when they see that their grandchildren are caught up in the midst of a marital break-up. I am not surprised that your mother-in-law is having to take antidepressants.

What I find striking is the fact that you have scarcely even mentioned your children. How many of them are there? What are their ages? And how do they feel about their mother suddenly going off with another man?

I do appreciate that you have fallen deeply in love with this new man. And, clearly, you are consumed with sheer lust for him! From my experience, I know that this sort of thing happens to human beings quite often and, once it occurs, it is rarely possible to 'reverse' it.

So I am not going to say to you: 'You must stop having sex with this man'. That would be a waste of words. But what I feel you should do is to recognise that your recent actions have caused considerable trauma for:

Your husband;

Your children;

Your mother;

Your sister;

Your husband's mother and father; and

Probably quite a few other persons.

Please try to consider their feelings. If you persist in saying that they will just have to get their heads 'round it, then you are never going to get anywhere.

I suggest that you go to a counsellor who can help you to understand the feelings of all these relatives, including your children.

Doc, don't be shocked by this, but I have always been rather proud of the size of my testicles. All my adult life, I have felt that I have more of a 'pack' than other guys.

However, last week I had to go to a doctor to get advice about a belly problem. To my surprise, he looked at my genital area and said: 'Oh, you've got some fluid there, and it needs to be drained off'.

When I asked him what he meant, he said that I had something that sounded like 'hydro-seals'. He explained that they are 'collections of fluid'. And it seems like it is these things that are making my scrota look so big.

As I left, he told me that I should do an operation to have all the fluid taken out, and to remove these 'hydro-seal' things. Doc, I am real scared about that. What must I do?

OK, the word he was saying was 'hydroceles', which is pronounced 'hydro-seals'.

Many men have them. It is a collection of clear fluid around the testicles. They are painless and a lot of men don't even know they have them. The fluid just makes the scrotum look bigger.

In most cases, the presence of the fluid really does not matter. So unless your hydroceles start to hurt, I do not think that you need worry about them. I don't feel that you need to do an operation.

I am a woman who has pain in her right side for a long time. No doctor seems to know what is wrong. I went to two different hospitals, and one said I have 'diverticulosis'. The other said I had a kidney stone.

I can't figure out what is going on, I live with low-grade pain every day.

I am sorry to hear about all this pain. One thing I can tell you is this: Diverticulosis is a real common bowel condition, but it mostly occurs on the left side of the belly. So it is very unlikely that it would cause pain on the right side of the belly.

The other diagnosis you have been given was 'kidney stone'. That is certainly a possibility. It is quite common for little stones to form in the kidney and then to get stuck in the narrow pipe (the ureter) that leads down to the bladder. That causes violent and intense pain. It is certainly not 'low-grade'.

I feel that what you need to do now is to find another doctor, someone who can take a clinical history and who will examine you carefully. She may need to order certain tests. I hope she can find the answer to this problem. Good luck.