Doctor's Advice - Can I have multiple orgasms?

Q. Doc, I need some frank advice. I am a happily married woman, but I am
wondering if I am sexually inadequate. You see, the other day I was
with a group of girlfriends just sitting around the pool shooting the
breeze. The discussion turned to our sex lives and one or two persons
had a little to drink so I guess that loosened their tongues. They
began talking about orgasms and it became clear that two of them have
multiple orgasms regularly. If I understand correctly, it means that
during sex, a woman climaxes several times, one after the other. Is that
correct? What was surprising to me was that when the others joined in
the conversation, they all talked confidently about 'multiple orgasms',
as though they had them too! I kept quiet, because the fact is that I
have never in my life had more than one climax in an evening. I have a
feeling that it might be pretty tiring. But what is the truth, Doc?
Does everybody except me to experience those multiple climaxes? If so,
is there something wrong or abnormal with me? And what could I do about
it?

A. Your story has several interesting points. First of all, it
shows how people who have had a drink can start talking rather freely
about intimate matters. It also shows that when one or two strong
personalities start saying things with great confidence, the others tend
to agree with them!

Finally, we can observe that when someone
makes a claim about a particular sexual activity being routine or what
everybody does, there are very few people who will have the courage to
disagree with them.

A generation ago, it was widely believed that
not many women were capable of multiple orgasms. But in the second half
of the 20th century, doctors and researchers began to observe that a
substantial minority of women seemed to have that ability. And these
days, many 'sexperts' think that over half of all women could enjoy
multiple climaxes if (and it is a big 'IF') the circumstances are right.

What
do I mean by 'if the circumstances are right'? Well, the truth is that
women do not have multiple orgasms unless they are truly relaxed and
happy with their partner. Also, such orgasms will not occur unless the
man knows exactly what he is doing.

No reliable scientific survey
has been done on this subject in recent years. However, I have noticed
that these days, a lot of women who are over the age of 40 report that
they have multiple orgasms. But the ability to do that is very rare in
younger women.

This strongly suggests that many women actually
learn to enjoy repeated climaxes as they become older. Also, I get the
impression from my patients that a woman is more likely to have multiple
orgasms if she has a long-term loving partner with whom she has
developed a very strong relationship.

Having said all that, I must
stress that many women do not really want multiple orgasms! They are
quite happy with one per session, and have no wish to experience a
second one.

As it relates to you, I hope that what I have just
said has shown you that you are not abnormal. If you really are content
with just one orgasm for the night, then that is fine. However, if
you decide that you would like to explore the possibility of having
more than a single climax, then I suggest you read an informative
article in the US women's magazine Cosmopolitan. It is called 'How To Have Multiple Orgasms', and you can find it on-line at www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/tips-moves/Orgasms-Unlimited.

Q. Doc, do you think my wife has gone insane? After 12 years of marriage, she has left me for a slightly younger and very handsome man who spends all his time paying her ridiculous compliments and telling her how wonderful she is. Is this insanity on her part? And will she return to her senses?

A. People whose spouses have left them often claim that the reason must be 'insanity' or 'temporary madness'. In my experience, this is never the case. Usually, when a wife or husband leaves there is a good reason. And the person who has been left behind should think very carefully about what the actual cause of the 'split' was. So my advice to you is to talk with a counsellor about why your marriage went wrong. And when you get into another relationship, take care not to repeat any mistakes you have made.

Q. At 38, I have suddenly started bleeding between my menses. Can I assume that this is just early menopause?

Q. Certainly not! All women should appreciate that bleeding between periods is definitely not a menopausal symptom. In fact, blood loss between menses can be due to a variety of gynaecological disorders, two of which are very serious. So please do not delay. Get to a doctor this week in order to have an internal examination. You may well need a referral to a gynaecologist. I wish you well.

Q. Doc, I am having some difficulties in the bedroom. My doctor has suggested that I should take a tablet called 'Levitra'. Is this the medication that will keep a man firm all day?

A. No. Levitra (also known as 'vardenafil') is a useful erection-inducing drug, closely related to Viagra. But it does not last all day. Generally, its effects goes on for around four to six hours, though men vary a little in their reaction to it. The 'longer-lasting' medication that you are thinking of is called 'Cialis' (also known as 'tadalafil').

Q. Does pain in the breasts indicate cancer, as I have heard?

A. No, not usually. The most common symptom of breast cancer is a lump in the breast. There are other possible symptoms, like unexplained puckering or dimpling of the skin, in-turning of the nipple, or a blood-stained discharge. For more information, just Google the words 'breast cancer symptoms'.