DOCTOR'S ADVICE - Has she lost her virginity?

Q. Doc, could you tell me if I have lost my virginity? A week ago, I was at a party where I am sure there was far too much alcohol. The boys were encouraging the girls to drink in a sort of game. Well, towards the end of the evening, I was feeling happy but a little out of it. I was dancing with a young guy who seemed very charming and also very handsome. We went off to another room and started kissing. I don't really know how it happened, but we finished up on a bed. I kept my skirt and panties on, but he somehow managed to pull the panties a little bit to one side so that he had access to my private parts. To be honest, Doc, I think that what happened was that he pushed himself about half an inch into me - no more. Then I made him pull away. That was the end of it. We got up, kissed once more, and then went back to the party. I had a really bad hangover next day, but fortunately, soon recovered. I never want to drink that amount of alcohol again! However, what is concerning me is this: Am I still a virgin, doctor?

A. Your story is a warning to other girls about the dangers of alcohol. What I say to all of them is this: Do NOT drink too much, and at all costs avoid 'drinking games', which are usually just intended to get young women drunk!

Fortunately, it sounds as if you and that young man stopped before matters had gone very far. But are you still a virgin?  Well, from what you say, there was a tiny degree of penetration - maybe half an inch or so. This means that from a purely LEGAL point of view, you have just about had intercourse. And that means that legally, you are no longer a virgin.

But if your recollection is correct, it seems likely that your hymen is still intact. Certainly, you do not mention feeling anything go 'pop' or any blood loss.  So the odds are that if a doctor did an internal examination on you, the doctor would say that medically, you still appear to be virgin.

Two final points:

• From what you say, it would appear to be very unlikely that you are pregnant. But just watch out to make sure your next menses arrive on time;
• The brief sexual contact which occurred would have been long enough to give you an STI (sexually transmitted infection). So let us hope that this boy was 'clean'. If you develop any worrying symptoms, like a vaginal discharge, please check with a doctor.