Doctor's Advice:Is my mother talking sense?

Please give me your medical advice as to whether my mother is talking sense, Doc. I know that when she was a young girl she had a real bad time with her menses. It seems like she had a lot of pain and bled a great deal. Well, she has always told me that 'a girl has to put up with that sort of thing'. I have had truly terrible periods since I was 16. My mother says that I must have 'inherited that tendency from her', and she assures me that nothing can be done about it except 'take aspirin and be brave'. But is this true? Is there nothing that can be done for me?

A: Well, though I sympathise with your mother, who obviously had a very bad time when she was young, the fact is that life is different now.

These days, teenage girls and adult women do not usually have to suffer during their menses. In most cases, a doctor can help alleviate or even abolish the pain. And it's possible to give medication that reduces the flow to manageable levels. The medication will also keep the periods regular.

Using medication to make the menstrual flow light and regular is also good for a woman's general health and because it helps prevent them becoming anaemic (weak-blooded).

So what I urge you to do now is to go and see a sympathetic doctor. You should take with you the dates of your last few periods, as well as how many days they lasted. That sort of information is invaluable to a doctor.

The doctor will check your eyes to see if you are already becoming anaemic and examine your belly - though it may not be necessary to do an internal examination.

Finally, the doctor will give you medication. I can say with confidence that there is a very high chance that this will bring your periods under control.

I wish you well!

Is there medication for stopping unintended erections?

Is there a tablet which you or any other doctor could give me to stop me having erections? I find them most embarrassing. I am a male teenager, and for the last couple of years, I seem to get these erections at all times of the day and night. When I am talking to somebody, it can be quite difficult as I have to hide it somehow. I would say that at the moment, I get around four or maybe five erections during the course of the day. Some of them are caused when I see a pretty girl, but others just seem to happen. I don't know what to do about this, and I would like to get some medication.

A: Sorry to hear that this has been embarrassing for you, but what you don't realise is that most young guys do get unintended erections. Research done in the United States showed that four times a day was about average.

Sometimes the erection is sparked by seeing a beautiful female or by thoughts of sex, but often, it is caused by friction of clothing against the head of the penis or even by vibrations caused from travelling in a bus or car. And sometimes it seems to happen for no reason at all.

So you are not abnormal. And I regret to inform you that there is no medication that a doctor can give you to stop you having erections. Theoretically, it would be possible to prescribe female hormones for you, but no doctor would do that - especially as they have rather unfortunate side effects in males like making you grow breasts.

If it is any consolation to you, you will find that as you get a little older, you will not have so many erections.

The contraceptive injection has stopped my periods. Should I be worried?

I am a 20-year-old female. Just before Christmas, I was given that contraceptive injection, which they call 'the shot'. Now, I find that I am not having any periods! Is this serious? Or could I be pregnant? I had quite a lot of sex in January.

A: Relax! It is most unlikely that you are pregnant. One of the common side effects of 'the jab' is the absence of menses. So you have nothing to fret about.

Your periods should return eventually, but this may not happen until you have stopped using the shot.

Does the final thrust make women orgasm?

I do not understand women and their orgasms. My friends say that it is the final thrust of intercourse that makes a girl climax because the tip of the male organ hits the cervix. Is that true, Doc?

A: No, it isn't. Like many young men, you and your friends have not realised that intercourse by itself isn't very likely to bring a woman to orgasm.

Generally, what is required is some sort of stimulation (such as repeated pressure) on the lady's clitoris. As a rule, deep thrusting does not make a female 'discharge'.

One of the reasons so many women have trouble in climaxing is the fact that lots of guys think that deep thrusting ought to be enough to make them orgasm.

Oral sex is disgusting!

I am engaged to a guy who is three years older than I am. I am 21. I love him. There is only one thing about him that I cannot stand: his interest in oral sex. He often wants me to do this for him, but I would much rather have 'real' sex (that is, intercourse), which I enjoy a lot with him. I cannot tell you how disgusted I am at the idea of having his penis in my mouth, Doctor, and when he discharges, it is so revolting that I can scarcely bear to think about it. I shudder at the thought of all that mess. What can I do? Am I obliged to put up with an activity that I hate?

A: No, you certainly aren't. Oral sex is increasingly popular these days, and statistics from the United States, England, and France suggest that most young couples do it sometimes.

However, it is most definitely NOT everyone's cup of tea. Quite a few young women can't stand it, particularly if the male partner goes all the way to orgasm. No woman should feel that she has to do it.

It is obvious to me that you and your fiancé must sort this problem out - before you get married - otherwise, I can see you ending up divorced in a few years' time.

My recommendation: Both of you should immediately see a counsellor who can give you some helpful sessions where you can talk about this problem and see if you can reach a compromise. But if you can't reach an agreement, please think very carefully about whether you two should marry.

'Last longer' tablets

I'm male, 19. Should I buy the 'last longer' tablets that I have been offered in a bar?

A: No! They might be anything. If you are not 'lasting' long enough, consult a doctor.

Email questions to Doc at saturdaylife@gleanerjm.com and read more in the Outlook Magazine tomorrow.