Want to know my secret?

Here we go again. 'Cowboy' Christie, like a modern Don Quixote, is again on the lookout for windmills at which to tilt. A December 15 Gleaner report headlined 'Sandals Whitehouse sale raises eyebrows' informed that he was turning his "spotlight on the reported planned sale of the Sandals Whitehouse hotel in Westmoreland".

Some, of independent thought, might be tempted to ask, "What sale?" The Old Lady of North Street's report continues: "The OCG wrote to the Government Monday to query if there was any truth to the report which surfaced in the latest edition of The Sunday Herald that talks were under way for the property to be sold to the Gordon 'Butch' Stewart-led Sandals Group, which now operates the hotel."

Talks? Just 'talks'? And based on a Herald rumour, to boot? Come on, Cowboy, not even you can be serious about this. Let's remind ourselves again exactly what our contractor general's job is. His functions are set out in Section 4 of the Contractor General Act as follows:

"4 (1) Subject to the provisions of this act, it shall be the function of a contractor general.

(a) To monitor the award and the implementation of government contracts with a view to ensuring that:

(i) Such contracts are awarded impartially and on merit;

(ii) The circumstances in which each contract is awarded ... do not involve impropriety or irregularity;

(iii) The implementation of each such contract conforms to the terms thereof ... ."

Now, boys and girls, repeat after me: What can the contractor general monitor? Why, "the award and the implementation of government contracts", Teacher. One more time, everybody: What does he monitor? Contracts, Teacher, contracts! Can he monitor 'talks', boys and girls? No, Teacher, only contracts!

Section 4 (1) (b) also permits him to monitor "the grant, issue, suspension or revocation of any prescribed licence ... ." A licence is a type of contract that gives permission to carry out regulated activity on specified conditions. So, Cowboy's remit includes contracts and licences. He's not (yet) the Czar of talking.

What the law says

Section 15 of the act also provides, in part:

"(1) Subject to Subsection (2), a contractor general may, if he considers it necessary or desirable, conduct an investigation into ... :

(a) The registration of contractors;

(b) Tender procedures relating to the award of contracts by public bodies;

(c) The award of any government contract;

(d) The implementation ... of any government contract;

(e) The circumstances of the grant, issue, use, suspension or revocation of prescribed licences;

(f) The practice and procedure relating to ... prescribed licences".

One more time (after me), CON-TRACTS AND LICENCES. We're still permitted to talk. We can even hold secret talks. We don't have to tell Cowboy.

"Listen,

Do you want to know a secret?

Do you promise not to tell? Whoa, oh,

oh (don't tell)"

Unless, of course, as Lennon and

McCartney remind us, we want to:

"Closer,

Let me whisper in your ear,

Say the words you long to hear ... ."

What's exactly happening here? Based on that which hasn't been made public, it looks like Sandals wants to purchase the Government's share of the Whitehouse hotel it built and now operates. Should Government sell to Sandals, would even this sale process be something into which the well-worn Cowboy nose should be sniffing? Does Cowboy Christie have any right to advise Sandals how to spend its money? Must Government ask Cowboy's permission to sell capital assets? Or should he restrain himself from getting involved in matters above his pay grade and stick to public-works contracts, like building, repairs and supplies?

Maybe we shouldn't be bothering with elections, ministries or parliaments and simply put Cowboy in charge of Jamaica as Dictator Supreme. Or is he specifically limited by the Contractor General's Act to monitoring specific contract types?

As I've repeatedly pointed out, the original purpose of a contractor general was to eliminate the pork-barrel politics of corruption that surrounds the farming out of public-works contracts to party activists. The nation's business is still run by Government, which remains accountable to us (through our parliamentary representatives and, eventually, elections) for their errors, not to Cowboy.

As Arsenio Hall used to say, "Things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmm ..."

Peace and love.

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