Washing our dutty drawers in public

Daniel Thwaites, Contributor

EVERY SPIRITUAL tradition warns its disciples that to achieve either Godliness or happiness, one ought not to pay too much heed to what other people think about you. I suppose that advice would apply to nations as readily as to individuals. Perhaps it's why I feel ambivalent about the tourism industry, because to attract tourists the whole country is sometimes induced into the belief that we always have to be performing. And while I was watching Rosie of 21¹/² Sunlight Street, Kingston 13, I was reminded that we certainly know how to perform!

Anyway, there's been a lot of chatter about Jamaica's image in the wake of A&E's biography of famous native son Christopher Coke. The image I got was of a country in recovery - one that had almost become a narco-state, but had saved itself at the last moment. So all things considered, it was a good image. When last I checked, recovery is better than terminal disease.

All the same, which dirty clothes we like to launder in public is always an interesting commentary all by itself. Earlier this week, I was in a very public setting with a Jamaican who lowered her voice carefully, and with expressions of great annoyance, delivered the opinion that Peter Bunting had tarnished Jamaica's image by speaking plainly and truthfully about the Dudus matter. I told her to hush up about that one. But two sips later, she was holding forth loudly in raw-chaw patwa, without hesitation or apology about the injustice of the just-concluded Trayvon Martin trial. I wasn't about to hush her this time. We determined that Rosie of 21¹/² Sunlight Street, Kingston 13, would have done a better job than the prosecutors. "Justice wi need! Wi wah Justice!!!"

Regarding the A&E documentary, was there no thought about the country's image when red herrings and legal strawmen were fabricated to deny a legitimate request for a drug kingpin? But after threatening to turn Jamaica into a renegade state, precipitating the deaths of over 70 people, exposing the security forces to terrible danger, squandering billions of dollars, there should be no thorough investigation into what happened? Or there should be some kind of 'code of silence' on the minister of national security?

Remember when Mr Golding gave his infamous "constitutional rights don't begin in Liguanea" speech and befouled the Parliament? Talk about taking the dirty drawers and hanging it right out there for the whole world to see! It was immediately apparent that we were witnessing something new in the annals of Jamaica's political (and criminal) history, and we were all poorer because of it. Rosie can explain it: "I deh here before my maiden tek an' mi nevah see it YET. Soh anybody see it, DEM LIE! Caw wi nevah see it yet, an' wi waan back EVERYTING ... wi waan back everybody ... EVERYBODY! Wi waan disinfectant ... Jeyes ... soap powder ... all type ah ting fi clean out de house!"

"We need an enquiry. Call de Contracta! Wi need ... de Contracta! Wi flood out wid  's*** wata'  and gully wata ... . Wi need all type a sump'm fi clean out de GERRRMS... an de fly dem start inna de house now ... Unnuh come look again! An' it cyaan gwaan soh! ... Unnuh haffi doh bettah!"

Wi ah nuh tutty gran people

Or nuh tutty gran country ...

Or nuh tutty gran justice system

Or nuh tutty gran foreign policy

To clean it will take MANY WATA, like Hellshire ... Dat type of wata ... .

A Travesty

The Trayvon Martin verdict is a legal travesty. It stands for the proposition that a disturbed white adult can disobey law enforcement and proceed to stalk, provoke, then kill an innocent black teenager, and still get away with it because in America black people frighten some white people.

Notice that we don't live in a world where only Americans feel insulted by the Trayvon Martin verdict. We are happy to comment on their dirt at will. We should expect the same. We don't live in a world where only Jamaicans are concerned with what happens in West Kingston.

Similarly, the Government's contention that JFJ's online petition might embarrass us internationally is immaterial. The issue is whether it's based on truth.

Anyway, should Barack Obama or the NAACP not denounce the Florida injustice because it will hurt America's image? Why should it be any different with Mr Bunting regarding Tivoli or JFJ regarding incarcerated children?

Straight dope

Karl Samuda was right to haul up JAMPRO for the Pollyanna statement that everything is OK with Brand Jamaica in the wake of this emerging athletics doping scandal. It's not. We're taking a battering. There is much more to learn about it as I write, but make no mistake about it, this is sending shock waves of negativity throughout the world regarding Jamaica.

So much damage is done by the mere accusation that in many ways it's also the execution. The athletes and their families must be suffering terribly, and one wants to believe that this is a horrible mistake. We all know who is the mega-mega-star, and if he ever found his way on to the list of doping athletes, it would be all over.

Honestly, I are frettin'! What would it mean if this is another situation that needs to be cleaned up with many wata, like Hellshire?

The smoking ban

Everald Warmington and Delroy Chuck are correct to upbraid Fenton Fergusson for not presenting the new smoking regulations to Parliament before the day of implementation. I have also seen where the JLP group CAPI is protesting the criminal penalties attached to breaching the law. I agree with them.

Banning smoking in public spaces is a good idea, but moving from an unregulated free-for-all, bypassing Parliament, and throwing down criminal penalties for breach, is too much too fast. Tek time nuh! Ah nuh tutty gran Parliament!

I personally agree with smoking bans, but mostly out of jealousy. Religion and common sense teach me that any cheap pleasure is ultimately destructive, and surely enough, having once been a smoker, I've never lost the craving. So it bothers me that other people get to enjoy cigarettes while I have to sit around and chew bubble-gum. I'm not saying public health isn't important, but I'm more interested in having smokers suffer for their pleasure. It evens out the scales. However, I don't think a man should acquire a criminal record because he lights up in an incorrect spot.

Plus, the idea that criminal punishment can be applied by ministerial declaration is very disturbing.

Daniel Thwaites is a partner of Thwaites Law Firm in Jamaica, and Thwaites, Lundgren & D'Arcy in New York. Email feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com.