Carolyn Cooper | Mi lose offa Lisa Hanna

CHAKA-CHAKA SPELLING

Mi cyaah believe seh Lisa Hanna well an glad fi tek di hell of a pay raise weh di MP dem gi demself. Mi did tink seh she woulda stand up fi principle. But no! Lisa Hanna same lacka di rest a di MP dem weh a gwaan like seh dem nuh understand wa mek so much a wi bex bout di wickedness weh dem do. Comrade an Labourite bex same way.

Mi nah seh di MP dem nuh fi get nuh raise. But how it coulda right fi dem tek more dan 200 per cent pay raise an most a di odder public servant dem get ongle 20 per cent? Wa mek di MP dem couldn’t tek 20 per cent fi start off an raise up dem pay lickle-lickle? Johncrow nyam out dem conscience.

Mi bex so til wen mi tink how mi mek mistake go big up Lisa Hanna inna mi column, “ChatSHT writing the script for MPs.” Mi did seh, “ChatSHT is certainly not writing Lisa Hanna’s script.” Dat a after mi did hear fi her big speech inna parliament: “So, Madam Speaker, I am, I am Jamaican first. . . .” Mi did wrong fi believe her. She nah defend Jamaican people. Ongle di MP dem!

Smaddy weh call imself ‘Victorious Victor’ did try warn mi bout her. Dis a how im did back-answer mi inna im post pon Gleaner website: “She is also ChatSHT. . . . What did she do when she was in the cabinet? In another country she would be hosting A[c]cess Hollywood.” Mi seh to miself, wat a man wicked an bad-mind! No sah!

SING DI SAME SANKEY

Den wat a way Lisa Hanna an Andrew Holness a sing di same Sankey! Mi just find out seh from 2021 Hanna did write one column fi Jamaica Observer weh she seh, “If we truly seek to move our country forward, demanding more from our elected officials and top civil servants, we must realise that we cannot attract the best talent on the present salary scale, and we need a new approach. We could start by requiring minimum entry requirements with performance-linked salaries that are commensurate with market conditions and the expectations of the job.” Which market? An she seh “It is time we accept the age-old adage, ‘you get what you pay for.’”

Seet deh! Dat a di said same ting Andrew Holness im a seh now. It look like seh, sake a how Lisa Hanna nah run fi di People’s National Party (PNP) again, she nuh business wid all like Mark Golding. She nah follow backa im an gi up fi her big pay raise. Mi a wonder if she a go light candle an sing Sankey an find her way back to di Jamaica Labour Party (JLP). If a so, she better mind sharp she nuh jump outa PNP frying pan an inna JLP fire.

PRAPA-PRAPA SPELIN

Mi kyaahn biliiv se Lisa Hanna wel an glad fi tek di el av a pie riez we di MP dem gi demself. Mi did tingk se shi wuda stan op fi prinsipl. Bot nuo! Lisa Hanna siem laka di res a di MP dem we a gwaan laik se dem no andasta wa mek so moch a wi beks bout di wikidnis we dem du. Komred an Liebarait beks siem wie.

Mi naa se di MP dem no fi get no riez. Bot ou it kuda rait fi dem tek muor dan 200 per cent pie riez an muos a di ada poblik sorvant dem get ongl 20 per cent? Wa mek di MP dem kudn tek 20 per cent fi staat aaf an riez op dem pie likl-likl? Jangkro nyam out dem kanshens.

Mi beks so til wen mi tingk ou mi mek mistiek go big op Lisa Hanna ina mi kalam, “ChatSHT writing the script for MPs.” Mi did se, “ChatSHT is certainly not writing Lisa Hanna’s script.” Dat a aafta mi did ier fi ar big spiich ina paaliment: “So, Madam Speaker, I am, I am Jamaican first. . . .” Mi did rang fi biliiv ar. Shi naa difen Jamiekan piipl. Ongl di MP dem!

Smadi we kaal imself ‘Victorious Victor’ did chrai waan mi bout ar. Dis a ou im did bak-ansa mi ina im puos pan Gleaner websait: “She is also ChatSHT. . . . What did she do when she was in the cabinet? In another country she would be hosting A[c]cess Hollywood.” Mi se tu miself, wat a man wikid an bad-main! Nuo sa!

SING DI SIEM SANGKI

Den wat a wie Lisa Hanna an Andrew Holness a sing di siem Sangki! Mi jos fain out se fram 2021 Hanna did rait wan kalam fi Jamaica Observer we shi se, “If we truly seek to move our country forward, demanding more from our elected officials and top civil servants, we must realise that we cannot attract the best talent on the present salary scale, and we need a new approach. We could start by requiring minimum entry requirements with performance-linked salaries that are commensurate with market conditions and the expectations of the job.” Wich maakit? An shi se, “It is time we accept the age-old adage, ‘you get what you pay for.’”

Siit de! Dat a di sed siem ting Andrew Holness im a se nou. It luk laik se, siek a ou Lisa Hanna naa ron fi di People’s National Party (PNP) agen, shi no bizniz wid aal laik Mark Golding. Shi naa fala baka im an gi op fi ar big pie riez. Mi a wanda if shi a go lait kyahngl an sing Sangki an fain ar wie bak tu di Jamaica Labour Party (JLP). If a so, shi beta main shaap shi no jomp outa PNP fraiyin pan an ina JLP faiya.

For an English translation, visit https://carolynjoycooper.wordpress.com/

- Carolyn Cooper, PhD, is a teacher of English language and literature and a specialist on culture and development. Send feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com and karokupa@gmail.com