When it comes to apnoea and other sleep disorders, I am a snore-house of knowledge. What was a gentle fluttering noise emanating musically from my olfactory organs when I was in my prime (if, as my children argue, there ever was such a time) eventually became the melodic phrase that the calypsonian, Atilla the Hun, used to describe the arrival of the Graf Zeppelin in Trinidad in 1934: "a rumbling and a tumbling in the atmosphere".