Why love is essential for good health
Published:Wednesday | February 12, 2014 | 12:00 AM
Anastasia Cunningham, PAJ Award Winner
'Love is our true destiny. We do not find the meaning of life by ourselves alone - we find it with another' - Thomas Merton
It's impossible to go through life without love. Absolutely impossible. The human body simply cannot survive without love. Like the need for air or food or water, the need for affection is part of our design. It is critical to our survival. Love is very, very, very essential to a person's overall good health.
And it doesn't necessarily have to be the love of a lover. In fact, love comes in all shapes and sizes - a partner, friend, children, parents, family, church brethren, even a pet.
At every stage of your life, there is some love, some emotional connection, some bond you have formed with another living creature that makes you happier and healthier.
To have the best cardiovascular health, your emotional and spiritual heart is just as important as your physical heart, and care must be given to all aspects of this vital organ.
The body, mind and soul depend on that love for optimal performance. Your heart, hormones, fitness level, youthfulness, immune system, pain threshold, nervous system, mental health and mood all benefit from experiencing love.
It's true that understanding the affairs of the heart is still the biggest mystery to man. Human emotions and the responses they evoke are the most studied yet least understood of all the human components.
But one thing can't be denied, love is a very powerful emotion.
Love is so powerful it is almost like an addiction. We crave love; we pursue love at all costs, and when we lose it, we go through a very emotional state of withdrawal that affects every aspect of our life that can actually make us physically ill.
Because there are chemical processes in the brain that affect how we feel, when a person is in love the body releases 'feel good' hormones, like oxytocin and dopamine, that send out a strong signal of an almost euphoric feeling, affecting every organ in our body and in turn our overall well-being.
Whatever your beliefs, love was ordained when God created mankind. "The LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him'." - Genesis 2:18.
So improving your love life is the best thing you can do for your health.
SOME BENEFITS OF LOVE
Normalises blood pressure
Love is proven to lower blood pressure and decrease stress levels. A 2007 study found that happily married couples had lower blood pressure levels than unmarried people, while unhappily married couples had higher blood pressure than both groups.
In another study, despite high risk factors like high cholesterol, high blood pressure, and diabetes, men who felt loved by their wives experienced half the angina as men who felt their wives didn't show them love.
Close relationships with good friends have the same effect. A 2010 study found that people with quality relationships had lower blood pressure than their less-social counterparts. In fact, the loneliest people in the study saw a 14.4-point rise in systolic blood pressure when compared to their popular peers.
Makes you happy and laugh more
People experiencing love always have a more cheerful disposition. They get less agitated and bothered by things, laughing more, are more compassionate, kind, caring and always see the positive side of life. Studies have shown that couples in love who are experiencing financial difficulties are much more happier than wealthy loveless couples.
Reduces depression
One study found that subjects who were recently married scored an average of 3.42 points lower on the 84-point depression scale than unmarried subjects.
Simply living with your significant other can also reduce your risk of mental health issues. A 2005 study of middle- aged women discovered that living with a significant other reduces the risk of psychological problems just as much as walking down the aisle.
Love releases a slew of feel-good hormones that put you in a good mood, calm the nervous system, relieve depression and stress.
Boosts your immune system
Love decreases inflammation, improves your immune system, and can be a potent pain reliever. Some studies have suggested that the happiness that comes from being in love may be associated with lower stress-related hormones and better immune function. On the other hand, people in harmful, bad relationships are at a greater risk for developing heart problems, depression and a weaker immune system.
A great pain reliever
Studies have shown that love activates a part of the brain responsible for pain relief; a survey of 100,000 adults found that happily married couples were also less vulnerable to back pain and headaches.
The Institute for the Advancement of Health conducted two surveys involving a total of 1,746 people who did volunteer work. Results showed that just helping out in the community offered relief from pain related to stress-sensitive conditions like multiple sclerosis, and headaches, and lupus. Researchers suggested effects were due to relaxation and endorphin release.
A healthy sex life means greater health
A study by Wilkes University found that having sex at least once a week increases your levels of IgA, the antibody that fights illnesses and keeps us healthy. The important hormone oxytocin is released when we kiss or touch someone we love, and studies show that it can suppress stress hormones and boost immunity.
One study concluded that, over a 10-year period, men who had sex at least twice a week were half as likely to die as men who had sex less than once a month.
Keeps you young
In a study at the HeartMan Institute, levels of the anti-ageing hormone DHEA (dehydroepiandrosterone), which produces feelings of youth and vitality, were found to be high in people in love, increased between 50 and 100 per cent in the participants. One researcher also found that just before orgasm and ejaculation, DHEA spikes to levels three to five times higher than usual. It was also found that showing love and affection slowed the ageing process even more than receiving love does.
Leads to a longer life
The National Longitudinal Mortality Study has found that happily married couples have a longer lifespan than unmarried couples. Happily married men are also half as likely to suffer from a heart attack, while some studies claim that both married men and women have drastically lower rates of serious diseases such as diabetes, heart disease, Alzheimer's and lung disease.
Keeps you physically fit
Making love not only gets your heart rate up, but it is a great way to burn calories, while enjoying the act. In one research, the statistics showed a 30-minute lovemaking session can burn up to 230 calories; 20 minutes of foreplay burns 87 calories for women and 107 for men; sex standing up can burn up to 600 calories; masturbating can burn up to 150; having an orgasm can burn off 60-100; and depending on your preferred position, you can torch up to 300 calories in one go.
Improves self-image
Love improves self-esteem, which leads to better self-care. Self-love is key because when you love yourself, you are much more likely to engage in activities that contribute to better nutrition and physical fitness, and less likely to make unhealthy lifestyle choices.
Improves sleep
Sleeping next to someone you love makes you feel more relaxed, which helps you to sleep better. Adequate rest is vital to heart health and overall well-being, as the body repairs itself during sleep.
WAYS TO IMPROVE YOUR LOVE LIFE
Be more loving, kind, giving and compassionate
Hug often and kiss more
Hold hands each chance you get
Tell your loved ones often how much you love and care for them
Be generous, always show your appreciation and gratitude
Smile often - that lights up your eyes
Be more playful and include fun things in your life
Flirt with life and enjoy it more
Make love as often as you can
Send random texts that say something special to your loved one
Be spontaneous, surprise your loved one often
Plan a romantic dinner or getaway as often as you can
Surprise your loved one by doing the housework and the cooking
Give your loved one a relaxing foot, back or body massage
Give your loved one a warm bubble bath with a full body massage after
Give roses or a special token for no reason other than to say I love you
Dance and sing as often as you can
Laugh without holding anything back
Always treat your loved one like a king/queen
Go on a picnic to a nice, quiet spot
Do something for your loved one that they will appreciate
Get involved in community work and volunteerism
Do random acts of kindness
Love yourself and be kind to yourself
Treat yourself as often as you can
Treat yourself the way you would treat a true love
Remember, love is a strong emotion, representing human kindness, compassion, and deep affection. Love is unselfish and benevolent. Love is pure.
Importantly, the more you love yourself, the better equipped you will be to love others. And the more love you give, the more you will receive.