Let's talk life - My child is failing school

• My child is failing school

Dear Counsellor,

My teenager is not doing well in school and I am concerned. He was a bright child, but is now failing in school.

- Joan

Dear Joan,

Teenagers face many daily challenges and some have difficulty coping. You need to speak with your son to find out the challenges that he is facing. Adolescents have to deal with negative peer pressure, substance use, criminal activities, difficulty in academics and family issues. High school requires students to be organised and be self-learners. Students need to be good organisers of their time and activities. They need to complete homework on time and hand in assignments. Studying needs to be done daily not just before examinations. Some teenagers need to be supervised closely and their activities monitored.

Your son might be depressed and this is causing academic problems. He might be using ganja or cocaine and this is impacting on his functioning.

Take him for an assessment by a mental-health practitioner. His urine needs to be checked for ganja or cocaine. He will require counselling to help him cope with life.

• Caring for someone with dementia

Dear Counsellor,

My mother is 85 years old and has dementia. She is not able to remember names or locate her personal belongings. She is a picky eater and does not sleep well at night. I would like to improve her health.

- Marion

Dear Marion,

Thanks for sending in your letter. Our population is ageing and people are living longer. As we grow older, the possibility of getting dementia increases. We need to manage diabetes mellitus, and hypertension well as these are risk factors for dementia. If the individuals have diabetes mellitus or hypertension, then these can make the dementia worse.

Your mother needs to have 24-hour supervision as she can wander away and become unable to find her way back home. She will get angry or get depressed, because she is aware of her deficit and is unable to do anything about it. She will get frustrated and may become aggressive. The aggression may be verbal or physical. She might accuse others of stealing her belongings, because she cannot remember where she has placed them.

The care of patients with dementia is medication and psychosocial interventions. It involves education of the caregivers about dementia and its treatment. It can be rather difficult to take care of a sick person so the caregivers need intermittent breaks to recharge their batteries. Her naps in the days should be restricted so that she will want to sleep at nights. She may need sleep aid at nights. There are medications to prevent the rapid deterioration of her cognitive function. Talk to your doctor about the various medications, which can optimise her treatment.

Her appetite can be improved with vitamin B complex and the healthy meals that she used to love. She may need liquid meals like Ensure. She may need to be fed at each meal, and this will require patience and tolerance. A meal plan is needed and you can substitute various foods with fibre and nutrients.

If she is incontinent, then she would require diapers with frequent changes. Talk with her as you usually do, but be prepared that you will have to repeat yourself several times. She may not remember current affairs, but she will most likely remember events in the past. You can attend meetings of the Alzheimer's group where you will meet other relatives and share your successes and problems. Read to her and encourage her to share her life story.

Email questions and feedback for Dr Yvonnie Bailey-Davidson to yvonniebd@hotmail.com or call 978-8602.

Yvonnie Bailey- Davidson