Let's Talk Life

Not coping well with stress

Dear Counsellor,

I have a lot of stresses and I don't think that I am coping well.

- Margaret

Dear Margaret,

Stress is part of life and some of us have great difficulty with it. Some people eat a lot and get obese whenever they are afraid, fearful, worried, or stressed. If your diet is unhealthy, then your health will be compromised.

Consuming too much coffee is a way of coping for some people. You can become addicted. People use coffee to jump-start their energy in the morning, use it throughout the day to stave off a caffeine crash, and then find that they have disturbed sleep, causing them to wake up tired and needing the caffeine jolt to get going again the next day. The cycle continues.

Some people use alcohol to soothe their sorrows and cope with stress. Others smoke a lot while some people spend a lot of money regularly on things that they don't need.

These addictive behaviours can be treated by a psychiatrist. Safe strategies are breathing exercises and muscle relaxation. Visualisation and meditation are helpful. Your psychiatrist will teach you the strategies. Talk therapy is useful and will teach you how to cope.

Issues rape victims face

Dear Counsellor,

I was sexually abused when I was a teenager. I would like to know some of the problems that victims have to deal with.

- Henrietta

Dear Henrietta,

Trauma can cause psychological as well as physical pain. Trauma can fracture our integral parts like thinking, feeling, sensing, and behaviour. Some psychological symptoms experienced are confusion, difficulty sleeping, headaches, increasing fears, overeating, difficulty concentrating, unexplained emotional outbursts, panic attacks, anxiety, depression, and palpitations.

Other symptoms include distressing memories or dreams, loss of interest in what were meaningful activities, emotional numbing, increased anger feelings, increased health problems, feelings of detachment or separation from others and self, and restricted range of emotions such as inability to have loving feelings.

The mental and emotional effects of sexual abuse may last a lifetime, but counselling can help the individual cope with feelings of isolation, guilt, depression or anxiety.

Some individuals suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder, depression, sleep disorders, eating disorders, body memories, multiple personality disorder, engage in substance abuse or self-harm and attempt suicide. Others have flashbacks or borderline personality disorder. Adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse experience an array of overwhelming and intense feelings. These may include feelings of fear, guilt and shame.

Adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse can be helped by counselling and or medication. Please see a psychiatrist.

Email questions and feedback for Dr Yvonnie Bailey-Davidson to yvonniebd@hotmail.com or call 978-8602.