Helpers from heaven and hell

Egerton Chang, Guest Columnist

Love them or hate them, most of us have had a helper at some time in our lives - whether live-in or live-out, whether for a day's work or weekly, or whether just to wash and iron or to tidy a room or the entire house.

While we have, collectively, had our share of problems with them, I think it is fair to say they have been a huge help, by and large. Some have been so close for so long that they have become part of the family. Like it or not, they help shape our behaviour and attitude as young children and also those of our children.

I am sure that each one of you can relate a story, good or bad, about the influence of helpers in your life.

When I was quite young, my parents used to have two ladies that came to wash and iron for the entire family (at one point up to 15 in the household). They seemed to have been with the family for ages.

I don't seem to remember one of their names, but the other was called Robbie. They washed and ironed for us from I could remember to adulthood, from when we used to lay out white clothes and sheets in the sun, on zinc sheets, to 'bleach' them out. This after boiling them in kerosene tins for hours, seemingly, to get out stubborn stains.

Robbie didn't speak much, but occasionally I remember hearing her discuss with my mother, Miss Alice, things like what happened on Portia Faces Life and Dr Paul, two of the soap opera serials that Rediffusion (RJR) used to air daily in those days.

Then there were Cynthia and Gloria, who took care of us children, for a time, when we were quite young. While what we learnt from them cannot be readily quantified, I remember them straightening their hair with hot iron. The process seemed so slow and tedious, with the iron having to be continuously placed into a coal fire to heat it.

TRAGEDY STRIKES

One night I heard a lot of weeping and wailing coming from their quarters. The wailing was so loud and deep it pierced the night air like a knife. Gloria had just received word that her brother had committed suicide by lying on the train track one night in such a position that his head was severed. That was the first time I was introduced to death and the consequences, thereof.

I recall them horse-playing around with a male employee and I was introduced to the Jamaican saying, 'Puss bruck coconut inna yuh eye', except I learnt it as 'Cat bruk cok'nut ov'r yuh eye'. That is a proverb I have used on a number of occasions since.

There was Maudie and her daughter, known as 'Tiny', which was a misused moniker, as Tiny, who was a few years older than I, was far from tiny. Maudie must have worked with my grandmother, who lived next door, for well over 30 years. Tiny was born there and left as an adult. Maudie was a hard worker, taking care of my granny and uncles, and of us when we ventured over that side.

I, myself, have employed a number of helpers over the years. A few were outright thieves or found cooking a serious challenge. Yet, on balance, they have been good. The good ones include Pauline, who still does work for one of my sons, and Althea, who has been with us, on and off, for some 20-odd years. I said on and off because there have been times when Althea has left us and times when she was 'fired'. But she is back with us now and she has, over the years, been like family.

So much so that last year, my wife and I attended her mother Lucinta's funeral on Maxfield Avenue and I attended a wake off Grants Pen Road for her father.

Helpers assist our children to widely varying degrees. From helping them to prepare for school to actually helping them with their kindergarten and prep-school homework, they have been of assistance. In the very old days, they would provide the secluded and sheltered children with the news of the countryside ("wat ah gwaan outa road")..

THE DARK SIDE

Yet, there is no hiding the horror stories concerning household helpers. In an article aptly titled 'Horror Stories', published September 17, 2001, former Flair coordinator Barbara Ellington related some examples:

Beverly Dixon, Mandeville: "We had a helper who would empty the food cupboard every Friday evening before going home. It did not occur to her that we needed the food or even to ask before taking it."

Janet Green, St Andrew: "My helper went through my house 11 years ago when my daughter was a baby, stole all my jewellery, makeup, the bullets from my husband's gun, a ring which was a gift from my mother, and her own pay. The hurtful part was that we had to take our infant daughter overseas for medical treatment, and when I got there I realised that she had also removed US$800 from where I had hidden it. We let her go, but we did not recover some of the missing items till long afterwards."

Shawince Roberts, Portmore: "When my baby was one year old, I surprised the helper by coming home early one day only to find her chasing the baby to beat her and shouting, 'You too rude' at her. I fired her on the spot, because I thought of all that went on when I was not around."

To be fair, the helpers probably have some horror stories of their own concerning their employers. So it's probably a case of 'can't live with them, can't live without them' - on both sides.

Evelyn Scott, then-president of the Jamaica Household Helpers Association, gives the following (as reported by Petulia Clarke, then Gleaner staff reporter):

• SOME TIPS FOR HARMONIOUS HELPER/BOSS RELATIONSHIPS

• Helpers should always try to be nice to employers.
• Helpers should try to be discreet in using some things like the telephone. Use your conscience.
• In the event that something like theft happens once, the two parties should try to work it out before blazing up.
• When on the job, helpers should behave themselves; if anything comes up, do not retaliate.

In conclusion, as one gets older and is wont to round the sharp edges of one's respective horrors, one can readily (or grudgingly) say, "Hail to our helpers."

Egerton Chang is a businessman. Email feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com and e_rider69@hotmail.com.