Glenford Smith | Career choice and parental influence
Published:Wednesday | March 11, 2020 | 12:18 AM
QUESTION: Mr Smith, I have to commend you for the article on Letay Williams. I didn’t read the story until you suggested it in your article. I was inspired by it and thank Letay Williams for telling her story. Two points jump out at me: the part about people saying you are selfish and that many people never go within for career direction. I am 18 years old and am experiencing some pressure to do something that my parents want but which I have no interest in. What do I do and still get them to fund my education? – F.S.
CAREERS: Thank you for your warm note of commendation to Letay Williams. The story is inspiring as you have said, and other Jamaicans can be motivated and instructed by it just as you are. But unfortunately, not everyone will seek it out, read and think about what they read like you have.
I would like to comment on each of the two important points that made an impact on you before I answer your question.
When people charge you with being selfish and only think about yourself they do so unwittingly. Most never stop to think: But wait a minute, I want my friend to do things my way and if they don’t do it, I am calling them selfish? Maybe I’m being selfish.
They are just saying something automatically and majority of them are just acting without conscious thought.
There are those, however, who do it consciously as a means of manipulation. They have mastered the art of making others feel guilty and painting them as the bad one. Many parents, siblings, friends and acquaintances fall into this group. Don’t fall for this trick.
The manipulators don’t know what it is to be a true and sincere friend; guard yourself from them.
Learn to think and to act independently of your family and friends and you won’t be easily manipulated by them.
Each and every day, we meet many people who sometimes say something to help us or guide us, but we fail to appreciate or act on the guidance because we’re too busy. Letay Williams has gone within; you have been led to read her story and have been touched. Listen quietly for your intuition to what it is saying to you.
Many people listen to what their friends and family say to them more than their own inner voices.
With regards to your question: I would caution you at your age that you carefully choose to talk with your parents about career choice. Tell them the decision is yours to make, not theirs. Then hear them out.
Do whatever you can to get a secondary or tertiary education. You can follow your dreams when you’re a little older and wiser – don’t let the opportunity pass you by. Being obstinate and insisting that you will have your way will not serve you.
Glenford Smith is president of CareerBiz Coach and author of From Problems to Power and Profile of Excellence.